This year has been so amazing, as I've learned how to be "just a mom" and all that entails. You know, "just" taking care of the kids, house, yard, budget, groceries, meals, activities, etc. I've thoroughly enjoyed every moment, even those moments that the kids are driving me bananas. I've never once considered that I'd be happy to go back to work.
I've been able to be there for play dates and park trips, ballet classes and Terrific Toddlers, beaches, laughs, cries, and tummy aches, first steps, first sentences, and first days of Kindergarten. I've been there. I've seen it and savored it, documented, cataloged and tried my best to help make memories that my kids will never forget. Because, I believe that is one of the most important jobs we moms can have. I've been so blessed with this time and I've never taken it for granted.
A couple weeks ago, right before Christmas no less, Lance was informed that his company is not doing too well and that everyone would be getting 20% pay cuts come January 1st. That's tomorrow. It's scary, because that's a lot of money to cut out of the monthly budget! That's a lot of things we won't be able to do and moments where we might be holding our breathe as bills come in and money goes out. But what's more scary is the thought that I may have to go back to work. Lance is looking for another job, but the market isn't great right now, and who knows how long it will take him to find another job. In the meantime, there's this little voice in the back of my head telling me to savor every moment with the kids. Just in case. Just in case this dream comes to an end, even if it is just temporarily.
Worrying and stressing isn't going to do any good, so I have just three new years resolutions, this New Years Eve.
1. Take 15 minutes of quiet time every morning. Make the time. Set the alarm earlier if needed. Let the kids scream if needed. 15 minutes to myself to think, read, pray, and prepare for each day.
2. Blog every day. I've gotten really bad about not blogging and it is something I enjoy. I need to make time for it.
3. This one is the biggest one. I need to let go. I need to give it to God. My worry and stress and wanting to control things doesn't actually change anything.
Farewell my wonderful 2008! Here's hoping 2009 is just as great!
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