Open letter to woman I've successfully avoided for five years

Dear Person,

You used to be a substitute in the bunko group. I find you to be....odd. We don't have much in common and I found myself avoiding talking to you unless forced to during bunko (like at the same table). Then you showed up at couples bunko and I was all "not this too!". I saw you at the gym. We've been in some classes together, but it's time for working out, not chit chatting.

Or at least that's what I thought. Until today. When you cornered me during class on the track to tell me about you going into early menopause. Because that's just what I had hoped to discuss with you today. Thank goodness for the instructor, who came along and encouraged me to go faster, so I had to speed by you. What can I say? She told me to!!

Then, when we got back to the classroom? You so rudely TALKED through the rest of the workout. Like, everyone else is all "oooouuccchhh" during the abs work and you're back there half-heartedly doing the work and talking someone else's ear off.

Will I need to figure out your schedule at the gym to avoid future conversations? Perhaps. I'm there to work out. Not to hear about your night sweats.