Tired

I was out later than normal for a Tuesday night last night with a friend of mine. And then I had to come home and unwind and watch some Olympics and catch up on email and Facebook and everything else that is SO UTTERLY IMPORTANT so as to keep me awake until well after midnight. And then this morning? Around 6:45, I wake up when Lance comes out of the bathroom after showering. I look at the clock, look at the video monitor and see Bennett is sound asleep. So, I get up and get dressed and SUDDENLY, Bennett wakes up OUT OF A COMPLETELY DEEP SLEEP. It is so bizarre. The way my kids can sense that I'm up. I mean, am I stomping around upstairs or something?? I am able to get the bed made before coming downstairs to get him and then I hear Morgan coming out of the bathroom, because, guess what? She's up TOO! Bizarre, I tell you! For once, I'd love to have that plan to get up before the kids and actually get to enjoy a cup of coffee before they wake up. Strange concept, I know.

I had decided to forgo the after workout shower after my 9am spin class (which was a KILLER, by the way!) and just show up at playgroup sweaty. Except that there were too many people that were not going to be there, so we cancelled it. Since I was already all hot and sweaty and the kids were wanting to go to a park anyway, I came by the house and packed up lunches for everyone and then we headed to a nearby park that we had never been to before. And it was like 100 degrees out there or something. Both my kids get red in the face when they get hot. Bennett's legs get red, too. Both of them were red faced within 15 minutes of being at the park. I pick a shady spot and we have some lunch. The kids play a little longer, finding a tree with cool roots to climb and fall on. :) Sorry for the grainy pictures - I forgot my camera and had to substitute with my phone. When I just couldn't stand the sun anymore, we headed home. You know what I love about picnic lunches at the park? Coming home and dumping them into their beds! They are exhausted from the fresh air and playing, full from their lunches and primed for nap time. Earlier naptime means that they are awake earlier in the afternoon, but that's okay, too. Except when they wake up before I'm ready for them to get up!

And now, when I have a million things on my to-do list, the exhaustion hits me. From being up late and getting up early. And from being out in the sun. And because it's hot. Waahhh! And I've not only got the stuff on my to-do list hovering over me, but I also have children who are awake and need attention. And it's hot. And I'm tired. Did I mention that? Is it dinner time yet?

One more funny

As I was hitting "Publish Post", Bennett takes off with some of the laundry that I have folded and was out on the couch. Morgan's underwear. And she's cracking up that he's running around WITH IT IN HIS MOUTH. Oh my.

Today's Humor

So, the last entry was a bit of a downer, I realize, so here's today's bits of humor.

* As I was pulling a load of laundry from the dryer, a NECTARINE SEED came flying out. Serioulsy?? Where do they get these things??

* I was going to the bathroom this afternoon, and as all moms know, you can't do that alone. Bennett is currently curious about the potty, so he always says "poppy" whenever I'm going to the bathroom. Only, it's a certain time of the month, so he was REALLY curious today. And when I was done and washing my hands, I looked back and he was all bent over the trash can, points and declares "nasty", which is his word for trash. Only this time, I had to believe he was right on.

* I had to stop by the doctor's office to pick up some paperwork for Morgan to start school. When we got there, I got Bennett out of his car seat and then came around to help Morgan get out of the car. She was taking longer than normal, so I said "C'mon Morgan!" and the little parrot I was carrying in my arm screams "C'MOOOOON!" Gosh, I hope *I* don't sound like that. Haha!

* On the way to Coscto, Morgan says to me, "Mom, did you see that girl at soccer hit me?", to which I replied that I had not. She told me what happened and I asked her if one of the coaches saw what happened. She said, "No, but I think the girl's Mom had put her eye on her". WHATEVER THAT MEANS!

* While at Costco this afternoon, the kids were snacking on goldfish. I stepped away from the cart for one second and suddenly they dropped the container and there were probably about a dozen or so goldfish on the floor. I look over and see Bennett puckering his fish like a fish. This is the "sound" that fish make (that's what Grandma taught him this summer) and he was just sitting up in the cart, making fishy sounds and pointing to the mess.

* Lastly, I find it very humorous that I can actually bribe my children to act remotely civil using FRUIT. I know! They are so deprived of the really good stuff in life, that they will actually just sit there in the buggy while I shop, just for a chance that I might buy some CHERRIES! My poor deprived children.

Moving on

Over the past few months, there's something that I've avoided talking about here. Mostly out of concern for the other individual, but also because I've been processing this whole time. Well. You know what? This is MY blog. This is about MY life and what's going on with ME. And now I've got something to say, dammit. So be it.

Several months ago, a good friend of mine and I endured what I'll call a friendship fracture. It's long and it's complicated and out of concern for her, I won't be getting into the details. We discussed the issue at the time, but since then, things have never been the same. I apologized for my part in the fracture, but never received an apology. At the time, I mostly wanted to make sure that I didn't lose this friend, and therefore resolved it within myself to put up with the issue that was still very much prevalent in the relationship, even without an apology from her.

Like I said, things have not been the same since and, having to bear the burden of being the only one to have apologized, the only one who agreed to make things different, and also now being the only person making an effort to repair the friendship, I wasn't too sure about it. But I felt like this particular person was worth it. Even despite the way that she put the burden of everything on me. I continued to invite her and her family to do things, but often times we'd get a last minute response or no response at all. She has also made some not very nice comments to me. I honestly want to believe that she didn't intend them to come across the way that they did (she tends to be a negative person), but how long am I supposed to go on pretending that the words she says or the actions she takes don't hurt? So, I made up my mind that I was done.

But then, I found out that she was going through a hard time. Being the softy that I am, I reached out to her and let her know that I was hoping for the best for her. Again, I extended myself to her and again, she treated me like crap. So, if I wasn't done before, I'm totally done now. A person can only take so much crap before they just shrug their shoulders and move on.

Here's me. Here are my shoulders all shrugged up. Here's me moving on.

But you know what? It's hard. I'm a person who has lots of friends, but only confides in a few people. She was one of those few people. And now I find myself without that confidant. And it hurts. Even as much as I know I don't want to subject myself to her and the issues that surround her, I also miss having her as a friend.

I know that I'll find someone else to confide in. I'm meeting new people every day. People I have a lot in common with. People who may become that type of friend. But that kind of friendship takes time to foster. And for the time being, while I am friends with many, I'll still feel a certain kind of loneliness.

Every person I'm meeting, I'm wondering to myself if this is the person who will become my new confidant. NO PRESSURE! Thank goodness these people can't read minds. This is worse than dating!! For example, I've been chatting it up with this one woman who's son plays soccer with Morgan. He's about to turn five and she also has another son who is about 13 months old. The same age split as my kids. And today? I found out she goes to the tennis club. And was actually there working out in the weight room at the same time as I was this morning! Hello! Coincidence?? I think not! We didn't figure this out until we were at soccer practice, but we practically made plans to get together to workout before next soccer practice. (Okay, maybe that is a bit of a stretch, but she DID tell me that maybe we'd see each other before next week.) And that's just one example. Imagine this a hundred times over as I'm meeting parents of the incoming kindergartners, parents at the tennis club, other people in the community, etc. It kind of becomes a lot.

And all the while, I still have that lonely feeling in my heart. Not like I can't confide in others like my husband or my mother. But there's something about having a really good girl friend. There's something about having someone who'll sit on the phone and cry with you over how hard it is to be a parent. Someone who'll laugh with you when you tell them that you forgot to bring your underwear to the gym. Someone who you can tell your deepest secrets to, knowing that they will keep them safe. Someone who'll be there, whenever you need them.

I've had these kinds of friends come and go throughout my life. As life changes, people's needs change. I know that this is one of those situations and that this is the sign of progress for me. I've decided what I will not accept from a friendship and what I need from a friendship at this stage in my life. I also know that some of the people that I am lucky to call friends right now could become this type of friend to me. That's how friendships work.

That doesn't mean that I'm not feeling alone throughout the process I'm going through. And I just have to accept that. And move on.

Our summer days are counting down...

This weekend was great, don't get me wrong, but I'm a bit run down after too much fun. Seems like as much as I love the weekends, I also love getting back into my groove of the week on Mondays. And knowing that we are only three more Mondays away from Morgan's first day of Kindergarten makes it even more special. Special because I can't wait to GET HER OUT OF MY HAIR and special because, well, it's her first day of big kid school. *sob*

We got up this morning and I got half of my chores done while also getting the kids dressed, fed and all sun screened up. We walked the mile to the community center where we splashed and played in the pool, had snack, and then played a little more before it was time to come home. We walked the mile home and it was lunchtime when we walked in. I got the kids settled down at the table with their corn dogs while I finished cleaning the bathrooms and then ate my lunch myself. There was only one "oh crap" moment during the whole thing and that was when Morgan somehow flung her glass of milk off the table and onto the floor. Glass shards everywhere, Bennett looked confused and a little scared and she was nearly in tears telling me that she didn't mean to and that it was an accident. I told her that it was okay. No big deal. Let's not cry over spilt milk, after all. Once lunch was over, I knew Morgan had a too-busy weekend when she informed me that she was going to go wash her hands and face, go into her room and turn her music on and crawl into bed. I could come in there whenever I was ready to read her her story. So, I read Bennett his story, put him down for his nap and found Morgan all cuddled up inside her comforter, laying on "If you give a moose a muffin". I read her her story and then she quickly went to sleep.

I've spent the better part of their nap time catching up on stuff I normally do on Sundays - meal planning, planning out the classes I'm taking at the club this week, planning my to-do lists, shopping lists, and errands lists. I was too busy and too into MOI yesterday that I did none of this. So, now I'm fully organized again to start my week. Ahhh, love it. I'm debating putting some "bigger" organizational stuff on my to-do list, but part of me wants to put this off until after school starts. I guess I'm planning out the last of the summer and that stuff just doesn't seem to fit the category.

I was reading a book yesterday about preparing for the start of school. It gave lots of practical advice about it, such as having an "end of summer" celebration dinner and starting to get the kids to bed earlier, 10-15 minutes a night. Given the kids were up at least 2 hours past their bedtime each night this weekend, I think I need to get a grip on this. Because next week? I have to start WAKING THEM UP EARLY (I know!!). Just to be prepared because the following week? I have to have Morgan to school by 8. Eeek! So, tonight we'll have our "end of summer" celebration dinner. Morgan has requested pasta, so I'm going to come up with some sort of semi-healthy concoction. And we'll celebrate the end of the summer and start working our way towards being responsible citizens again. You know, getting to bed at a decent time and even trying to get up on a regular schedule. Phooey.

We breed morning people

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books
How can you not be in a good mood after waking up to this in the morning?? Even though I was tired as all get out this morning, he energized me. :)

Good day. Busy day.

Today was another busy, but good day. It started out with me being really tired since we got home from the BBQ late last night and went to bed late and Bennett got up in the middle of the night. But, I got up and got showered and Morgan and I headed off to church after breakfast. We came home for lunch and then took off again for one of her new friend's (an incoming Kindergartener) birthday party. It was at our very cool community center pool, and Morgan had a blast. And yes, I'm being totally lazy and NOT downloading the ACTUAL pictures I took, and instead snatching the one off the community center website. :)

While we were there, any anxieties that I might have had about having another mom watch Bennett while I work at the school this year were put to rest. The mother in question, whom I had traded digits and email addresses with yesterday at the park, was at the party. She was there with her 14 month old daughter. We were sitting there chatting away, her daughter sitting on her lap, taking small bites of the pizza they had there at the party. Suddenly, the mom noticed that she was having a hard time breathing. The next thing I knew, the mom had flipped her upside down and was doing the Heimlich manoeuvre! The baby seemed to clear the item from her throat, so the mom turned her rightside up and then suddenly, she was choking again. She tossed her upside down again, Heimlich again and then she was breathing and crying. She did a finger sweep and realized that the baby had grabbed a confetti shark off the party table and had been choking on it! Oh my! But clearly, she's capable of watching my kid with those mad skills! We totally bonded over the traumatic experience and I think she might be joining the moms club and Bennett's playgroup. I'll call that the lemonade. :)

After the party, I came home and dropped Morgan off and then took off to see a movie. By myself. For the first time EVER. Sure, I had gone to movies when Bennett was a newborn, but at least I had a date. :) This time it was just me. And you know what? It was AWESOME! Nobody else to worry about. Nobody else to share the ginormous soda with. Nobody to fight over the armrest with. All me. It was awesome. Afterwards, I did a little more browsing in some nearby stores and then, once I knew the kids would have already been bathed and put to bed, I came home. :)

We're watching the Olympics and I'm going to *try* to get to bed early. Because tomorrow? We are going back to the community center pool with playgroup. Hello Monday. :)

THIS is the life :)

This morning, I had to refrain from too many "don't forget this" or "are you doing that" questions for Lance. He is their parent afterall, and while he may not do everything the same way I do, he is an excellent father. He had planned to take the kids geocaching after the park.

I was able to hang out at the park this morning long enough to get the requisite phone numbers and email addresses and then I headed off to the tennis club. Once there, I ran into some friends and felt no pressure to hurry our conversation since I had all the time in the world. :)

Once settled in, I hit the indoor track and ran a 5k in 30 mins, stretched, changed into my swimsuit and then hit the pool and hot tub. I sunned myself for a little while until I realized that I was actually hungry and then I hit the locker room to shower and get ready. I took a nice long shower, where I shaved not only my arm pits, but also my legs. Yes, both of them. :) I took my time getting ready, half watching the Olympics and half listening to my iPod. Once my hair was dried and flat ironed, I headed over to one of our favorite resteraunts where I ordered lunch and settled in with my book. I alternated reading and people watching, really letting myself unwind.

Once lunch was done, I headed to the bookstore and mindlessly wandered the aisles. I wasn't looking for anything in particular, but it was so nice to be able to just check out various sections and books and not have to get interrupted or listen to whining or fighting. After I had my fill of browsing, I settled in at the cafe with my laptop and started three different books. I'm toying around with a few different plots and so I gave a couple of them a good amount of time at the bookstore today, but I'm just not feeling it. They are serious topics, and maybe I'm more of a humor girl. So, the third idea is humorous and I didn't really get very far with that beyond the initial idea.

By this time, I was starting to clock-watch and thought it would be best to head home and utilize the free WiFi at home rather than paying to get connected there. Besides. You want to know the truth? I was missing my kids. I had already called on my way to the bookstore to see how everything was going. They were down for naps and Lance said they had a great time this morning. I'm sorry I missed out on it!

This is an illness I have. I can't be with them. I can't be without them. I guess that's the life of a mom, right? But I also know it's important to take care of myself, mentally, so it's good to have a day off. :)

We're getting ready to leave for a BBQ, so I'll resume my day off tomorrow at around 4pm. I plan to go see a movie. Maybe even by myself. Because I'm all CRAZY like that. :)

Ahhh, Saturday. And a day off, to boot!

So, yesterday did, in fact, turn out to be a good one. The kids managed to keep the craziness to a dull roar. I was able to get my chores done before going to a power sculpting class at the club, then came home and fed the kids lunch and got them down for their naps so that I could mow the lawns. After that, I even had time to shower and dry my hair and then we were off to the grocery store for some last minute party supplies.

We had a few friends over and it was fun. Good friends, food, and drinks. That's all you really need. :) We walked downtown to where they were showing the opening ceremony for the Olympics (or at least that was the plan) and hung out for a while while they tried to overcome some technical glitches. But the kids were having fun dancing around, eating snacks and just enjoying the "buzz" and excitement of the evening. We came back home when they gave up on overcoming the glitches and turned on the ceremony here and hung out for a while longer. Good times. :)

I had another glass too many last night and woke up this morning, so dehydrated that my EYES were dry. I think I had three glasses? So, I had no choice but to get up early-ish and get some water. But, when Bennett woke up at 7am, I moved no muscle in the direction of getting him up since IT'S MY DAY OFF! That's right! I'm off today. When the kids started with the "Mom I'm hungry" and "Mooooom, I can't find my pencils" this morning, I told them that Mom is off today and to talk to Daddy. :)

So, the plan is to go, at least briefly, to the park playdate this morning for the Kindergarteners so that I can try to figure out a time to do a "trial run" with watching her 14 month old and vice versa so we can work in the classrooms. Once that's done, I have the whole day to myself. And then we have a BBQ to go to tonight at 5. So, I may just show up right before that. :)

I have a feeling....

So, it's finally Friday. Hooray. And even though I didn't get much sleep last night, I have a feeling that today will be a good day. You can call me crazy if you want, but I just have that feeling.

Despite being out late and having one too many glasses of wine with the girls. Despite waking up at a little before 4 with an arm muscle that would NOT stop twitching, and then subsequently being awake until around 5. Despite the fact that Bennett woke up crying at 5:30 (but thankfully Lance got up and dealt with him). Despite the fact that Bennett continued to cry, off and on until I finally went down and got him out of bed at 6:30. I brought him into my bed and he proceeded to point out all the things related to "Daddy", like pajama bottoms, a cup, and his side of the bed. Despite the fact that I was up at 7, whether I liked it or not. Despite it all, I just have a feeling that it's going to be a good day.

Morgan woke up shortly thereafter, dressing before she left her room. When I asked her if she wanted breakfast, she said "Yes, thank you. But first, can I get Elly's food for her?" and then she proceeded to fill the dog's bowl with food. While eating breakfast, she asked me if I had any dusting she could help me with today and then when I told her no, asked if she could help unload the dishwasher. See, maybe it WILL be a good day today.

And just to press my luck, I've decided on a whim to see if some of our friends might be available for an impromptu Olympics opening ceremony party at our house. Yep, because we are selling crazy today.

Isn't it amazing what one night out with the girls can do for you? :)

I'm not the best mom in the world

I'm sitting here, in my post-mopping glistening, listening to Lifehouse on my iPod. I find them to be very inspirational and moving. And I need a little of that right now. I'm not sure if it's just the culmination of being on kid patrol for the past nearly two weeks without a real break, or if it's other things working on my psyche, but I'm not feeling like the best parent today.

I took the kids out to a park this morning to meet up with a new group of moms and their kids. This is a MOPS group from the church I've been attending regularly for the past 7 months. I've been sort of "eyeing up" the different groups in the church to figure out what I wanted to get involved in and I figured this would be a good one. It's mostly for the moms in the church, connecting to each other (they meet every other week for two hours and have breakfast, and either a speaker or a craft), but also provides a social outlet for the kids. So, I explain to Morgan that this gathering at the park isn't about *her* and I ask her to be patient and to please be on her best behavior. And, while I could attempt a similar pep talk with Bennett, I think we all know how pointless that would be. After securing her promise that she's be on her best behavior, we went to the park (which happens to be one of their favorites since it has both water stuff as well as play structures) and I meet up with some new Moms. Now, as a woman, I am keenly aware of how these "meetings" can often go. They have the potential to be wonderful meetings, but they also have the equal potential to be awkward and disheartening. I got up early this morning so that I could shower and put on clothes that matched and even eyeshadow and eyeliner in anticipation of meeting some new women. I had the pre-park warning talk with Morgan and had plenty of snacks packed, along with swimsuits and toys, and all the things that help ease a day at the park.

When we first met up with the other moms, Morgan kept interrupting the conversation to tell them random facts about her and her life. I asked her to please go play with the other kids, and after a little bit of resistance, she finally complied. Things were fine for a while, but then I heard Morgan being ugly to one of the other kids who dared to want to sit on a rock she had been sitting on. I asked her to please give him a turn and then she went into full 15-year-old sass mode. Arms crossed, glaring eyes and talking back. I was, once again, mortified by my child. I told her to come over to me, to which she started talking back and so I started the countdown... 5-4-3-2-1 and she's screaming at me the whole time that she's COMING AS FAST AS SHE CAN!! I asked her to sit down until she could change her attitude and she continued to talk back to me. I was SO EMBARRASSED. As I'm discussing the consequences of her behavior, she's getting more rapidly out of control. I'm now about five inches from her face, telling her that I will NOT put up with this type of behavior when, out of the corner of my eye, I see Bennett fall down from a picnic table, where he'd climbed up and had been standing on the bench. He hit his head on the concrete and it was all I could do to not start weeping right there. Morgan still had her attitude going on and now I had a wailing Bennett that I needed to make sure was okay. I grabbed Bennett up, sat Morgan down and started to make sure that Bennett was okay. Now Morgan's crying about having to get dressed and I grab her by the arm, look her in the face, and let her know that I'm so embarrassed by her behavior and that she WILL go get her clothes on RIGHT NOW or else she will spend the rest of the day in her room. She continues to talk back, but I just go put her clothes at a picnic table that's away from the crowd and point her in that direction. I'm changing Bennett and soothing him as she finally gets her clothes on and then we are finally able to leave.

As we are leaving, one of the MOPS moms asks if I think I'll be signing up (which I'm positive is code for "Are we going to have to worry about your kids hanging out with our kids?"). I told her I thought I would be signing up. And unbelievably, she sounded relieved and said "Oh, good, then we didn't make too bad of a first impression then?". To which I just laughed and almost snorted as I said "Oh, no. Not at all!". Unlike the first impression I just made.

I couldn't help but lose it in the car on the way home. I just feel like a complete failure. The fact that this child of mine has the audacity to be so disrespectful like that, particularly in front of others. How did this happen? And had I not been so distracted by her, then Bennett wouldn't have fallen. And really, I should have never let that happen. I just feel like a complete and utter loser as a parent.

So, I get home and I get through lunch with the kids, put them down for their naps and get on the phone with my mom. Who then assures me that this is normal. They aren't bad kids, but they are kids. And parenting is hard. We talk through a lot of "you did this" and similar like stuff. I tell her the obvious, that as parents, you are always wondering if you are getting it right. It really is the toughest job, with the biggest consequences. And she confesses that there are things she would have done differently. But, she can't go back and undo any of it. And it doesn't matter anyway, because my brother and I turned out pretty good. Therefore, the good that she did, must have outweighed the bad. And in the end, that's all that really matters, isn't it?

So, I've gotten some hope from my mom, who just so happens to be the best mom in the world. That hope is that maybe I'm not going at this all wrong. Maybe, though it may appear that my kids are going to be the biggest brats on the block, just maybe it's a stage. And maybe it's a stage I went through also. And see? SEE HOW GREAT I TURNED OUT?!! ;)

And just for my mom, I'll put this caveat in there. FINALLY. See how great I turned out, FINALLY. :) Thanks Mom.

It had such potential...

The day actually started out pretty good. I woke up early, when Lance's alarm went off and then deftly masked my woken state by covering my sounds with the sounds of Lance getting ready for work. I was successful at doing this, so I was able to get up, get dressed, get my bag packed for the gym, the bed made and then had an entire TEN MINUTES of complete solitude this morning. I know, miracle, right?

But the Momma senses are strong in my kids and soon, I hear the patter of Morgan's feet, getting out of bed. I hear her turning off her nightlight and then a little more stumbling, and then she comes out of her room, big grin stretching across her face, and announces that she got dressed before leaving her room like I asked her to last night. :) I gave her my biggest smile and a huge hug and then we headed in to get breakfast. These days, she's preferring cereal over any hot breakfast, so she's pretty easy. I start chopping up fruit for Bennett (some for now and some for playgroup) and make him some toast and then I turn on the coffee pot, sure that this will rise him from his state of slumber. There was an 8:30 class I wanted to take! But I didn't hear him, so I sent Morgan in to wake him up and she did just that. I went in and got him up and dressed and then set him in his highchair to eat his pears and toast. He was happy as a clam, as I went ahead and got his shoes on and gathered all the requisite bags by the door -- gym bag, gym diaper bag, and real diaper bag. Check, check, check. Morgan is quietly watching cartoons, which is a rare treat so early in the morning. Ahhh, breathe it in. A peaceful morning.

We get to the gym, not running so that I make my class, but WITH TIME TO SPARE, so I'm able to go to the bathroom and do some stretching before it starts. Morgan decides she wants to do Kid Fit, so I'm happy that she'll be burning off some energy before Bennett's playgroup. I took a new class for me - power cross training - and it was good, but I doubt I'll become a regular. Nevertheless, it was a good workout. After class, I have time to shower and actually dry my hair ALL THE WAY, including the FLAT IRON. Yeah, what a luxury! I'm chit chatting with some other moms about potty training, look at the clock and realize it's time to pick up the kids from the nursery. I get Morgan from the gym and Bennett from the nursery and we head off the playgroup.

Playgroup was going so well. We were at Melissa's house, in her beautiful backyard. Morgan had another older child there to play with and they were totally in love with their playhouse in the backyard. There was a water table for the little kids, and then Melissa went and got out the baby pool and Popsicles. The toddlers loved the Popsicles. See, here? This is one of the last pictures taken before the day took a grim turn.

I *think* it started when Bennett dropped the last 1/4 of his Popsicle on the ground. Given that he was already covered in Popsicle juice and the last bit had fallen on the ground, I walked over to the table to put it in the wrapper and throw it away. Only want to know what he saw?? Giant woman snatches baby's only possession, news at 11. Yep, he had a HUGE conniption fit. Okay, okay. So, I went inside and rinsed it off and he proceeded to lay himself on the ground so that he could have a full fledged temper tantrum. He scooted himself across their patio, kicking and screaming! I raced back to him with the freshly cleaned Popsicle and even that could not undo the events that unfolded next.

He stumbled around, drunk on his tantrum, and then he actually tried to go INSIDE with his purple gooey mess all over him. Of course, that wasn't happening until I cleaned him off. So, as I'm taking him over to the baby pool, he throws himself down on the ground and starts rolling around in the grass, screaming and crying. Oh the drama! People, this was academy award winning material. But, when I had the AUDACITY to try to wash him off in the pool??? Oh no. That's when he really pulled out the big guns. He even went so far as to start hitting himself in the head.

Trying my best to remain calm and at least APPEAR to know what I'm doing in front of all the other moms and kids, I take him over to dry him off so that he can then go into the house. EXCEPT HE WON'T SIT DOWN. Like I cannot BEND his legs that way. Oh this kid!! I finally wrap him up in a towel and pick him up and bring him inside, away from the spectators. He finally settles down, but I still had to get Morgan and our stuff outside together so we could leave. So, I go out and ask Morgan to get her shoes on so we can go. I'm sure you all know how she responded. "Of course, mother. I can see how difficult this is getting for you, what with the way my brother is behaving. I'll make it easy for you. Here. Let ME pack up the snacks we've pulled out. Oh, don't worry. I'll get the stuff back in my backpack." But that was just a momentary dream, and the reality of her standing there, crossed arms, telling me she didn't want to go smacked me right in the face. But, I cannot be distracted. I have a tantrum-drunk toddler on the loose inside. Must. Get. Stuff. FAST.

Of course, this is when Morgan bumps her head on the edge of a patio chair and I'm surprised that it wasn't pouring blood, from her reaction. I told her that when she was done with her dramatics, I need her to get her shoes on and gather her backpack and come inside. And off I went to deal with terror #2.

And I thought it was pretty funny when the pediatrician recommended a therapist. But you know what's even funnier than that? One of the moms asked me if I thought he got bit by a bee or something. Because that is the only explanation she could find for such behavior. Ha! I'll take that one to the therapist.

Number 12 - just for good measure

12. I just noticed that Firefox is displaying the pictures from my previous blog entry on top of each other. IE does not. I had to edit the entry only about 5,327 times and finally did it in IE since Firefox wouldn't let me drag the picture above where the box was in Blogger. IE will let me do that, but won't let me Undo when something goes awry. Frickity frack. Well, you know what? If you want to see the pictures without them being on top of each other, you're gonna have to suck it up and use IE. So there, Internet! ;)

Less than blissful

I'm not feeling the domestic bliss today. It's really just a series of minor irritations, but I'm just not feeling it. I know, I know. You are saying to yourself, "But she's always so cheerful and upbeat and always LOVES being around those two kids of hers, how can this be?" *yeah right* But trust me, if given the option TODAY, I just might opt to go back to work, where I fondly recall having a lunch hour. Yes, an HOUR. Devoted entirely to ME and EATING. I also recall being able to have a discussion on the phone without someone nagging me to play with them or screaming at me that they want more water. Yeah, I know most of the people who I worked with were children in their own right; but at least I could look at them, tell them they needed to figure it out, and not worry about whether or not they would cry or hit each other. (most of the time).

Here are just a few of the reasons why I'm feeling less than blissful today.

1. After dinner last night, I still had not gotten any exercise in and so instead of cleaning the kitchen, I went for a run. I came home and Lance had cleaned up the kitchen EXCEPT the pots and pans that needed to be washed by hand. I was actually surprised to find that the food wasn't just sitting out, since I didn't put it away myself, so I was totally prepared to wash those dishes. Except that when I thanked him for cleaning up the kitchen, he told me that he hadn't washed the pots and pans, but he would. How nice of him! Except as of this morning, they were not washed. Not even soaked. And I cooked pan seared steaks last night - and the whole "pan-searing" can do quite a number on a pan. So, I got to get up and immediately start washing dishes this morning. Lucky me! Oh, and we'll just tack this one on to here as well. I'm not sure how he didn't notice when he was cleaning up the kitchen last night, but the dishwasher was totally full when I got up this morning. And totally dirty. It had not been run. I know, it's so unbelievable that someone could actually FILL a dishwasher to the BRIM and not run it, but it happened to me. I swear it! So, now I have to run it and wait for it to be done and dry before I can put any dirty dishes in there. Yeah, not happy about this.

2. I was informed last night that we were "running low on dog food". So, I put it on my shopping list and thought that was that. Except this morning? Barely half a bowl of food for the dog. Now, I guess I should have some sort of "sense" for when we are running low, but honestly this is not MY thing. This is Lance's thing. So, the shopping trip got bumped up in priority since the poor dog can't starve. And who knows how much Bennett is going to feed her.

3. In another Best-Mother-Award moment, I called this morning to see about taking Morgan back in for her TB test. You see, I totally FORGOT to go back in the 2-3 days after the first test to have the test read. Yeah, I know. I suck. I had called when I realized, but it was too late to be read and they told me to call back another day to see about doing a drop-in for her TB test. So, I thought this morning would be perfect since it's right on the way to Morgan's soccer practice. So I call to see about the drop-in appointment and they tell me that she can't have the test performed again until SIX WEEKS after her previous vaccinations. What??? I'm totally thrown off by this, so I ask to speak to a nurse and they have to take a message. When she does get around to returning my call, she has to explain to me (several times, slowly so that I understand, and probably answering too many of my questions) why she can't have the TB test done now. The upside is that they had already prepared the paperwork and so it looks like she has complied with all the necessary vaccinations for kindergarten. Plus, they don't view her as a "high risk" person for TB. While I thank them for trying to work with me here and realize that I am ultimately to blame for this entire situation, I'm also a person who typically plays by the rules, so this really bothers me. I ask for the date that I can bring her back in and am told by the nurse that it's 4 weeks after her previous vaccination, so Aug 16. So, I can still have this done before she starts school, which is good. But this is all just another minor irritation to my not-so-blissful morning.

4. So, now with no TB test to go have done before soccer practice, I decide to go ahead and do my daily chores (laundry, cleaning out the diaper bag, my purse and wallet, cleaning the toaster, cleaning the bathroom mirrors and the computer screens). I actually break one of the mirror panels in our downstairs bathroom and can only think of seven years bad luck as I'm finishing the rest of my chores. As I'm doing this, Morgan pulls out Bennett's Mega Blocks and starts playing with them and then getting mad when he wants to play with them. I remind her that they *are* his, but that's neither here nor there to her. So, I go get *her* wooden blocks from the playroom for him to play with. I bet you can see where this is going. Now she wants NOTHING to do with his blocks and he only wants to throw her blocks at the wall, at her, at the TV, whatever. So, FIVE TIMEOUTS IN A ROW later, I'm counting down the minutes to leaving for soccer practice.

5. The phone rings and it's the people in charge of soccer and they're having to cancel soccer practice today because the coach is having car trouble. They will make up the session by adding another day to the end of the "season". Except that that is during school. She tells me that she's been hearing that a lot from the calls she's making this morning, so they might have to refund some of our money. Okay, whatever. And now we are here at home with no plans of leaving whatsoever.

6. Next up? Shopping. I decide that since I have the extra time and now have to go to the grocery store today, I will look at next week's ads to see if I should hold off on buying anything I was planning on buying until they are on sale. So, essentially all the planning I did on Sunday had to be redone. And as I'm doing this, I get a text message from the other co-director of the Moms club. She wants me to call her. Only a few people have RSVP'd that they will be at the board meeting. So, I call and unload on her all the issues I'm having right now with lack of participation of *different* people doing stuff for the club. I'm almost to the point where I just don't care anymore because I honestly cannot keep asking the SAME people to do the stuff that needs to be done. And I certainly don't want to have to do everything myself. As I'm on the phone with her, I walk outside into our courtyard for some privacy so I can speak freely. Except Morgan, with her ever so keen "Mom is on the phone" senses, follows me out there and stands, with the door cracked ever so slightly, trying to listen to what I'm saying. I'm doing all the hand motions for "GET YOUR ASS BACK INSIDE", but she acts like she doesn't know what I'm saying. I finally have to interrupt the person I'm talking to to ask her to get back inside. I told her that I came outside so I could talk on the phone in privacy. Want to know what she asks me? "Can I just play with the sand table?" The one that's outside? In the courtyard? Two feet from where I'm standing? Are you freaking serious??

7. Am I on number seven? I can't even keep count! We'll make that minor annoyance number seven.

8. So after getting off the phone, I finish up the grocery list and once the kids have been sufficiently "snacked", we head off to the store. The shopping trip itself is only your typical level of irritation - with Morgan jumping around from square to square at the store (note to self: see if we can't find a different store WITHOUT varying colored squares) and with Bennett yelling MAMA at the top of his lungs. I get to the dog food aisle and there's NO WAY I can get that size bag INTO the cart. You know why it needs to go INSIDE the cart?? Because there is no bottom rack on this cart. (I'm using the term cart since I am apparently the only person on the face of the planet that uses the word buggy for a shopping cart. I want you guys to understand me) SO GLAD I DECIDED I HAD TO SHOP TODAY FOR DOG FOOD!! But whatever. There was plenty of other things we needed, so it wasn't totally wasted.

9. They are running a promotion where for every $25 you spend, you get something for free. I spent $75, so I got some free bread, lunch meat and CINNAMON ROLLS. Like freshly baked cinnamon rolls. Cream cheese or vanilla, the cashier wants to know. Cream cheese, of course. This is irritation number nine. I don't NEED those freaking cinnamon rolls staring me down. But how can I turn them down?? They were FREE! I know you aren't going to believe me, but they actually called my name in the car on the way home. I know I heard it.

10. Staying strong, I have my EVERY DAY lunch of light bread, with fat free mayo, and 2% cheese and 98% fat free lunch meat (with pickles!), a side of baby carrots and 1 oz of Ruffles Light chips. And the kids got to eat a cinnamon roll after their lunch. Only they didn't finish it. So there was about 1/4 of a cinnamon roll left on Morgan's plate. And then, it practically DARED me to eat it. I don't know about you, but I'm always up for a dare. So, I ate it. And you know what?? It sucked!! It was dry and not at all delicious. It soooo wasn't worth putting those calories in my body.

11. Even though I got all my chores done this morning, know what I had to spend the first part of nap time doing? Unloading the freaking dishwasher, so I could put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. Yeah, not happy about this.

And they day isn't even half over. What other blissful things await me today?? I can hardly wait to find out!

Pictures from Cull Canyon

These are pictures from our trip to Cull Canyon yesterday. As you can see, Bennett and some of the other toddlers from his playgroup are having a great time. They really are enjoying digging in the sand.

Morgan was sitting on the beach and Brandon came crawling over to her and sat in her lap. She was rather pleased with herself.

Brandon also liked hanging out with the older babies and Bennett didn't mind sharing his "girls" with another boy.

The only down side was that there were some yellow jackets that were particularly fond of us. But, Cristina surrendered her turkey sandwich and they were more interested in that than they were in us after that. Thanks for taking one for the team, Cristina! :)

We may have to make another trip back there before the summer is over. The kids had so much fun and slept so well for their naps -- always a bonus!