Peas in a pod

Today at the park playgroup, I walked up on Morgan and this other little girl, being all sassy with each other.

Morgan says, "There are black windows in that tree."

Other girl says, "No, there are not!"

Morgan says, "Yes there are. You have to believe me!"

Other girl says, "No! I don't believe you. And I don't have to!"

I'm walking up as the other girl's mom is asking her not to be so sassy and I ask Morgan why she is yelling and being ugly to her friend. Very dramatically, she tells me, "She doesn't believe me!" I tell her that it doesn't matter. That she doesn't have to believe her and then I walk back over to the playground area with the other mom. We start talking about the girls and notice a distinct similarity between the two. Both are bossy, play mostly with boys, and are getting very sassy with their tone of voice lately. We're discussing things we've tried, and the girls react the same. Send them to their room? That's okay, they'll just play. Can't play with toys while in their room? That's okay, they'll read books. Sit on the bed with no toys or books? That's okay, they'll find something else to occupy them and they could stay there for HOURS. We've both tried taking toys away. Mine told me that she "likes her room all cleaned up" and hers told her "let's give these toys to other children who need them. It's okay. Santa will bring me more." Yep, two peas in a pod.

We're sitting there lamenting our options and getting their attention when another mom asks if we've heard about http://www.specialletters.com/. No, as a matter of fact, we have not. Because she sent her children a WARNING NOTICE that they had been placed on the naughty list. She said that straightened things right up.

GENIUS!!

Too bad it won't work on a 15 month old!!

I need to teach that boy about organization!

We are getting ready to go to our incoming kindergartener park playgroup this morning. I'm also making lunches and packing a bag for the pool because the plan is to go swimming after the park and have lunch there.

So, after getting everyone all dressed and sunscreened up this morning, I am getting shoes and socks ready by the front door. Only I can only find ONE of Bennett's tennis shoes. Hmm. So, I sort through the bins in the playroom. No shoe to be found. I look ALL OVER in his room. Nothing. In the basket of toys in the living room. Nada. Just as I've given up and I'm grabbing a carafe from the kitchen cabinet, what do I find? A shoe. Sitting on the shelf in the kitchen. Because that is SO TOTALLY WHERE SHOES GO. Who's child is this??

Also, I want the world to know that Morgan let me sleep in this morning. She announced it as such as I came downstairs at 6:30. Unfortunately, her brother didn't get the memo. No sleep for the weary.

Just call me cranky

I'm not sure if it's the manner in which I woke up this morning, or just the general progression of the day, but I'm tired and outright cranky. I guess everyone deserves their "moment".

My day started with my heart jumping into the pit of my stomach when I roll over and peek through my eyes and see a face staring back at me. I had no indications that she was sitting there, STARING at me while I was sleeping. I didn't hear a thing. But, there she was, nevertheless. I gasped while I tried to collect myself and then said, "Morgan, you SCARED me!". And then, she does what all five year old girls do in these types of situations, she started CRYING.

Sob, sob. "I can't reach the Goooogurts!" Sob, sob. "They are on the top shelf and I can't reach them!!!" Sob, sob. "I'm sooo huuuuungry!!! I'm STARVING!". Sob, sob.

Realizing that her reaction couldn't be merely about freaking Gogurt, I asked her why she was crying. She told me she didn't know. I asked her if she was upset about scaring me and she nodded that she was. So, I asked her if she wanted to climb into bed with me and she jumped in with a big grin on her face. We snuggled for a minute and then I rolled over to attempt to go back to sleep.

"Mooommmaaa!! You are pulling the covers!!"

Time to get up, I suppose.

Since Bennett wasn't awake yet, I opted to get dressed for the gym and pack my gym bag before heading downstairs. I stepped on the scale, as I do most mornings, and discovered to my horror that I'm actually GAINING WEIGHT. What the heck? I have been watching what I eat and definitely getting enough exercise. I don't get it. Whatever. Morgan helped me make the bed and then we went down and got her beloved Gogurt from the top of Mount Everest. She downed that in 0.7 seconds and then wanted cereal. I fixed her cereal and then started cutting up a cantaloupe for myself and Bennett. Of course she wanted some of that (she has to always have whatever someone else is having - drives me batty!). I put some in a bowl for her, wash blueberries for Bennett, and start toasting a leftover waffle for him. Since there was fresh coffee already made (in our new supersonic coffee maker who's grinder woke me up at 5:30 this morning - YES IT IS ACTUALLY THAT LOUD, I WILL BE RETURNING IT), I pour myself a cup of goodness.

By this time, the dog is practically crossing her legs while whining, so I pop an English muffin in the toaster for myself and go let her out. I quickly check email (and Facebook, of course). Then I hear Bennett, so I go get him up, dress him, and then let the dog back in. Back to the kitchen where I get Bennett set up with his breakfast and can finally sit down to eat mine.

Only, I don't get to do it in peace since there's always a kid needing something. And then there's the gentle (or not so gentle) persuading of them to PLEASE EAT because Momma really needs to make the 9am spin class. Once I'm done eating, I pull together the bag of stuff for playgroup, which consists of sunscreen, swimsuits and various water toys since we were going to a park that has water stuff. I get together the regular diaper bag with playgroup snacks plus the "lite" version that goes with the kids to the Nursery at the club.

The kids are done eating and now it's time to get Morgan dressed and her hair fixed. She, surprisingly enough, gets dressed with no arguing and brings me her hair bin to fix her hair, with me only having to ask once. While watching Bennett walk from one thing he's not supposed to get into, to another, and answering his "no-no" with a "That's right, that's a no-no!", I get Morgan's hair up in a pony tail. We get shoes on everyone and then we schlep it all out to the car - two kids, four bags and a mom who's not really sure what she was thinking.

But, we make it to the club in time to get everyone settled in -- Bennett to the nursery and Morgan to kid fit -- and I even find a nice spot in the spin class BEFORE the class is starting. I see a few friends and chat them up while we wait for class to start and then our instructor walks in and it's the infamous instructor from my very first sculpt-stretch-tone class. Oh joy. I push myself for an entire hour (this is all terrain cycling -- lots of sprints and hills) and my legs are burning. But this is no time to relax. Playgroup starts in 30 minutes and I need to take a shower!

15 minute shower, quick makeup and pulling the hair back and then I'm off to pick the kids up (Morgan from the gym, Bennett from the nursery) and head off to playgroup. Text the ladies I'm meeting to let them know we are on our way and then we hit traffic on the way there. Argh!

We finally make it there, 30 minutes late. I pack up the diaper bag, the beach bag with swimsuits and the bag of toys and also a present that I have been trying to give to one of the moms for about a month! I get it all in, on, and attached to the stroller and we get over to where everyone is. Just as I'm about to get Morgan into her swimsuit, she tells me she has to go potty.

OF COURSE SHE DOES!

So, I run her to the bathroom while the other moms keep an eye on Bennett (who is restrained in the stroller, thankfully). We get back, and I get Morgan in her swimsuit with sunscreen on and then send her off to play. Bennett is next -- swim diaper, sunscreen and swimsuit and he's off to play. And just as I'm about to sit down and relax for the first time today, Morgan comes over.

"Momma, I'm really sorry to tell you this, but I need to go to the bathroom again."

OF COURSE SHE DOES!

I attempt to leave Bennett with the others again, but he's not going for it this time and starts to throw a tantrum. I grab him, wet as he is, and carry him over while we wait for Morgan to do her business. Then, I'm finally able to sit down and sort of relax and it just hits me that I'm cranky! We played for about an hour until a group of older kids (probably from a camp) totally took over the park. Reverse the arrival process, getting kids out of wet swimsuits and into their dry clothes, repacking the stroller, complete with the gift that I have been hauling around for a month now, and then back to the car. We get home in record time (Momma was ready for nap time) and I've made up my mind. When the kids nap today? I'm napping. I haven't done this since we were visiting my parents' house.

I get home and cook corn dogs for the kids, warm up some leftover chicken and vegetables for me, and settle down to eat. Except Morgan is STILL HUNGRY. She tells me she wants a pear, so I cut one up for her and sit back down to eat. She asks if she can give some to Bennett, which I would normally allow, except that I had left the skin on her pear and didn't have the energy to get up and get the knife to cut it off for him. Poor kid.

Finally, though, FINALLY the kids were done eating and they each got their stories and then nap time. I take a quick glance at my to-do list and decide that a nap is definitely better than cleaning out my pantry, and turn on the TV and lay on the couch. And lay there. And lay there. For like, I dunno, an hour and a half? Trying and trying. AND CAN'T GO TO SLEEP. Which is totally ironic since the one day I decide I need one and will TAKE one, I CAN'T!!

So, here I sit. Telling the world how cranky I am. And I know that the kids are going to be up soon. And that makes me crankier. Because the time between nap time and dinner is the worst. And I'm hungry, dammit! But how dare I eat something, I'm already gaining weight.

Bahumbug!

Slow down, baby!

My baby is getting so big. I can't slow him down. I want him to happily swing on the swing at the park and be satisfied with just that. I'd love it if he'd quit trying to climb the stairs and slide down the slide. Because that's something that big boys do. And he's my baby. On the one hand, it is nice to see him able to tackle the stairs (both up and down) on his own, since it makes things much safer and in a lot of ways, easier. Still, he's my baby.

This morning, I packed a lunch and we headed off to Morgan's soccer practice. It's on a field right next to a playground, so after her practice is over, we often hang out at the park and play for a little bit. I thought it would be nice to have a picnic lunch as well. So, we sit there. Eating our sandwiches. All of us. He's sitting between me and Morgan and he just looks like a KID. Sitting there at the picnic bench, sandwich in hand, watching the kids play. Where did my baby go?

Yesterday was a different situation all together. He was miserable from teething; trying to break through two teeth at once on the bottom. Flushed cheeks, cranky as all get out and just wanting to be held. And that's what I did. I held him. Because I could and because he wanted it and needed it. It's not going to be much longer when he doesn't want to be held at all. After his nap yesterday, it was just the two of us (Morgan was over at a friends' house for a play date), so we sat on the couch, drinking water and eating snack. He was sitting next to me, holding my hand. Then he'd lean into me and say "Mama" with just the right tone that *I* knew what he meant. He was telling me he loves me. I would tell him I love him too and he'd smile his cheesy grin at me and then sit back, holding my hand.

Today, he's back to his normal, independent self. Climbing the play structure and sliding down slides. Pointing out trash and calling it "nasty". He is quite the handful at this age, but he's so much fun. I want to soak in every moment of it.

I try so hard to make memories with the kids. Seems like I especially do this with him -- I don't know if we'll have any more kids. I'm taking the snapshots of the moments. Taking in the sights, sounds and smells. I don't want to forget them at this age. Not even the tantrums. Because tomorrow, I'll look back and wonder where this time went.

It's really funny, I've met so many people lately and we'll get to talking about our kids. Inevitably, they will ask their ages. "Oh, I just love five-year-olds!" or "That whole one year to two year stage is the best!" and while I may have had a horrible morning, or maybe the kids are on my last nerve, I try to remember that one day, I'm going to think the same thing. So I better enjoy it while it lasts. Because tomorrow, it will be gone.

You will have fun and you will LIKE it

They have a program for the kids at the tennis club called Kid Fit. Basically, from 9-12, if you drop your kids off in the nursery and they are old enough, then you can sign them up to be taken over to the gym or to the clubhouse for different activities. They may play basketball, wallyball, tennis, and other assorted games. When our planned outing to a nearby beach today was canceled due to weather that isn't hot enough, I thought this would be the perfect thing for Morgan to do this morning. She's get to expend a little energy and I'd get to get my workout in.

I told her about it, really hyping it up, and asked her if she wanted to. She said she wanted to and asked if Bennett could go. I told her that Bennett wasn't old enough and she decided that she didn't want to go. She said she'd rather hang out with him and make sure that he's okay. I think this is really sweet, but I also know that they watch movies in the nursery. So, while she might like to play it off like she's being a sweet sister and all, I know her true motivations.

I reminded her that she can watch movies anytime and that Kid Fit was only certain times. Want to know how she responded? "I need to think it over. I'll get back to you." When did she turn 15?

She ended up NOT going to Kid Fit and as soon as she walked into the nursery, she was firmly glued in front of the TV. No point in arguing. So, want to know what I did? Determined to free her of her pent up energy, I decided that I would meet some friends at a park after we were done at the club. Haha! That just goes to show you. You WILL have fun, get exercise and activity in today, my dear! :)

Oh, and as a side note, you might be interested to hear that Ms. Unwaxed No Pants was in my sculpt-stretch-tone class (taught by the NORMAL instructor, thank God!) this morning. I know what you are thinking. She did have pants on. I found it somewhat difficult to look at her.

It's time to relax, damnit!

I recognize that I'm a "talker". I guess you could say I come from a long line of "talkers", and that there will be many more generations of "talkers" to come (as evidenced by the five year old, and maybe even the one year old, too). I've also been known to wake up in the middle of the night, or early morning and not be able to go back to sleep because my mind is awake and I can't quiet it.

You know what? It's hard being a talker! I talk so much that when there's nobody else to talk to, I talk to MYSELF. And that's a tad bit inconvenient when you are trying desperately to relax and let your mind GO. Have you ever done a stream of consciousness type of writing? Witness my experience at the spa this morning.

I get there a tad early, get in my robe and hang out in the lobby area, sipping water and reading my book. Pretty soon, a petite woman named Amanda comes to get me and lets me know that she's going to be my esthetician for the day. She lays out the day's agenda for me. Brow wax, salt glow and then a one hour deep Swedish massage. Sounds decadent!

We start the session off with some small talk, but immediately start Mom talk and I discover that she is actually by new BFF. Once she's managed to tame my brows, we move to another room where I'm asked to put on those famous gauze "underwear" and lay on the table. I do as I'm told, and look forward to the return of my new favorite esthetician. We continue our conversation and I'm so wrapped up in it, that I hardly realize that I'm actually getting a spa treatment and the whole point is to unwind. We're chatting away and then she says, "You are going to LOVE your massage today. I've heard he's really great. I've never actually had a massage from him before....because he's male....and he's cute TOO. I just can't do that. He told me he has seen a million butts before, but there's something about working with him also."

Insert panicky mind traffic.

That's right! I'm having a GUY massage therapist. I forgot!
He's cute? How cute?
A million butts?
He's going to SEE my BUTT?
I'm not wearing any makeup.
Who cares about makeup, what about the varicose veins?
Will I have time between treatments to at least go dry my hair?
What, am I going to DATE this guy?? Who cares. Really.

And that's what I settle on. Who cares really.

Until the salt glow was finished and I headed out to use the restroom and look in the mirror; seriously, I look OLD!

Who cares really.

Refill my water, add a slice of orange and then go sit in the sauna with my book.
I hope he can find me in here.
How will I know if it's him looking for me.
She said he was cute.
How cute?

WHO CARES REALLY?

Since I wasn't getting much reading done, I leave the sauna and go refill my water again and then a guy comes up to me and asks me if I'm Paige. And seriously? He wasn't even that good looking. I mean, he was no Woody Allen, but I don't think I'd classify him as good looking, per se. Breathing a sigh of relief, I follow him to the massage room. He asks me a few questions about areas to focus on and then leaves me to drop the robe and get on the table. A moment later, he knocks, comes back in when I respond and starts the massage.

Ahh, a guy. Guys don't like to talk. Time for me to relax. Let all the thoughts leave my mind. Ahhh.
What is that noise? Is he clanking CANDY in his mouth?

*crunch....crunch....crunch*

Is he CHEWING candy? Well, that's a little distracting. (as opposed to DISSECTING IT)

*heavy breathing*

Okay, *almost* good looking man, what is the heavy breathing about? Is chomping on that candy hard work?
Are you working that hard on the massage? It feels good and all, but that's pretty loud breathing.
Maybe he's trying to FLIRT with me?? Nahh. They aren't allowed to do that. Even though, I'm totally sure he wants to. Varicose veins and all.
Just tune it out. It's time to relax. Let the thoughts go.
Relax.
Man, I'm hungry. Hope he didn't hear my stomach growl.
I ate a good breakfast - blueberries, 1/2 cup of yogurt, double fiber english muffin and four cups of coffee.
Four cups is a lot. Plus the water. Hope I don't have to pee anytime soon.
I really like the water with the slice of orange in it. I should do that at home.
Wonder what the kids are doing right now.
Hope Lance gets the present for the party wrapped and gets Morgan ready to go before I get home.
Hopefully I can just come home and veg out since it will be nap time and Lance is taking Morgan to the party.
Maybe I'll blog.
What will I blog about.
That reminds me about the book. Having a hard time nailing down the plot. Should work on that. Maybe when I get home.
I kind of want to write it from a male perspective, but I can't recall a single book that I've read that was written by a woman, but had a male's perspective.
Hmmm
Okay, this can wait until later. Now it's time to relax.
Relax.
Ouch, that knot is NOT coming out of my shoulder.
Wonder why I get such bad knots.
Am I holding Bennett the wrong way? I try to mix it up and hold him in both arms, but I usually just do the one arm, most of the time.
He's so heavy now. Gosh, he's grown so big.
I can't believe school starts in a month.
I need to take Morgan school clothes shopping. That will be so fun!
I should wait until August, though, to take advantage of the new month's budget.
Oh, time to roll over already? Gosh, this goes by fast.
Okay, roll over quickly and pull the covers of you so he can't catch a peek.
WAIT A SECOND. IS HE WEARING HEADPHONES??? Seriously??
Is that so wrong? I'd probably want to wear headphones if I were a CMT.
I wonder what he's listening to.
Would it be rude to ask? Like would he feel all called out on his lack of concentration on MOI??
Now that he's sitting right behind my head, I can kind of hear it.
I wonder if I could have heard it before. You know, when I was busy TALKING TO MYSELF.
Why do I do this? Why can't I turn it off?
He moved my hand out of the way, hope it's not getting in his way.
Also hope he doesn't rub up against me.
Eeeww.
I think I'm sticking with girls for massages from now on.
Way less complicated. At least they'll carry on a conversation with me.


And then I won't be stuck here trying to relax, but actually just talking to myself.

Smarter than the average squirrel

We've been getting together with incoming Kindergarteners for the school that Morgan is starting in a month (insert panic!). This morning, we met them at the usual park and the kids were off and having fun. Suddenly, word came that a DEAD SQUIRREL had been spotted over under one of the big trees. A dead squirrel definitely trumps the swing, so Morgan ran over to Lance and asked him if she could go look at the dead squirrel. Not sure what "our" position is on admiring dead animals, Lance told Morgan that she would have to ask me.

I'm standing there, discussing the start of school with a group of moms when Morgan shouts out at me, "Mom, can I go over and play with Charlie?". I look over and see Charlie hanging out under a tree and turn around and tell her, "sure". What, am I going to tell her she CAN'T go play with one of her new friends? I thought that was the end of it, because I was unaware of the conversation between Morgan and Lance. Later, he revealed to me the depths of our daughter's sneakiness.

You see, Charlie was over by the dead squirrel. And instead of asking me if she could go over to the dead squirrel, she asked if she could go play with Charlie. She's no dummy, that girl.

Lance did tell her later that while she thinks she got away with something, she's not going to pull that one again.

With a smirk on her face, Morgan responds, "what do you mean pull?"

Camping out at home

Most weeks, I have stuff planned to get the kids out of the house nearly every day of the week. It's just so much easier to keep them busy, rather than dealing with the tantrums and hitting and fighting that eventually surfaces when kept indoors too much. I do usually reserve a day for hanging out at home so I can try to get some stuff done. More often than not, I'm talked into going to the park or going swimming, or whatever the activity du jour is. This is all fine and good, but I also think that sometimes it's good for the kids to just hang out at home. And use their imagination. And figure out how to play together. Sometimes nicely, sometimes not.

Yesterday was a day like that. I literally did not leave the house. I can't remember a day when I did that. We did, at least, play outside at the sand table and exploring the yard, but we didn't leave our address. And even though I was asked repeatedly where we were going, I stuck to my guns and we just hung out at home. You want to know what they did??

They camped! Lance bought these miniature tents a couple years ago from Woot. Morgan played with hers for a while after we first got them, but Bennett, of course, hasn't had a chance. He enjoyed going "night night" in it, but didn't really care for it when Morgan zipped him in there. Morgan was all about that they were camping and went and got food from the play kitchen for them to cook over the fire. It was very cute! Please excuse the dark video - it was "night time" at the old camping spot and no lights were allowed on. :)

While they were camping, I was able to change their sheets, dust their rooms, clean out and reorganize the hall closet and get laundry going. Which leads me to the following question for you.

Which of these are Morgan's and which are Bennett's?

Not that you can tell by SIZE, but the ones on the right are Bennett's and they are size 6-12 months. The ones on the left are Morgan's. Size 5T. *shrugs* Why must the girl's shorts be so small and the boys shorts be so big?? Just curious.

After camping was over (read: Bennett got tired of being zipped up in the tent), it was outside for some fresh air while I swept up the courtyard and porch and weeded the front yard. The kids played with chalk, played in the sand table and threw balls around. Lunch time came next and then nap time. I took the opportunity during nap time to call and make myself an appointment for the spa tomorrow. After nap time, it was the witching hours until dinner. Bennett has two teeth coming in on the bottom right now (finally we get some more - he has had six since February) and he's just got the devil in him. He was alternating between throwing his sippy cup at stuff, hitting Morgan and climbing up on stuff. The boy exhausts me. :) I'm sure we'll all be happy when his teeth come in. Even the dog.

Bringing home the bacon

Each night at dinner, Morgan asks Lance how his day was. She asks him what he did. He always responds the same -- same stuff, work. She'll sometimes ask if he was able to take a walk during his day. It's really cute that she's conversing with him like this over dinner. Tonight, it's much of the same.

Morgan: "How was your day, Daddy?"
Lance: "It was alright."
Morgan: "What did you do today?"
Lance: "Work. Same stuff I always do."
Me: "Morgan, do you know what Daddy does at work?"
Morgan: "I know he works on the computer."
Me: "That's right. Do you know what he does on the computer?"
Morgan: "He makes money."

And the grammy for the best written song goes to...

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

Spatula or fly swatter?

I made a quick trip to Target yesterday before playgroup to get a few things, including a new coffee maker and a fly swatter. You see, about a week ago or so, my husband broke our coffee maker. The lid that goes over the grinder won't go all the way down now and, without it, we have to put something heavy on top to make it work. So, we have our ghetto coffee maker going on right now, complete with the heavy cast iron candle holder on top. BECAUSE WE HAVE ADDICTIONS TO FEED, PEOPLE! (And yes, I said ghetto. Please don't call the PC cops on me.) And before the coffee maker? He broke the fly swatter. How, might you ask, does one break a fly swatter? Beats the heck out of me. Must have been a VERY LARGE FLY.

Anyhow, I'm on a mission because we have limited time before we need to be at the park for playgroup and I've got both munchkins with me. Morgan's helping me remember my list, because since I had kids, I can't remember what I went into the next room for. I'm all "What's on the list, Morgan?" and she's all "Coffee machine and fly hitter". Check!

So, we easily find the coffee makers in the small appliances aisle. I quickly scan the collection and zone in on the larger ones. We like to grind our coffee beans right before we make our coffee. Because we are all coffee snobby and stuff like that. Can you believe that NONE of the coffee makers had a grinder as part of it? Sure, you could buy a separate grinder, but that's for other people. Not lazy-just-want-my-freaking-fresh-ground-coffee-first-thing-in-the-morning people like moi. Besides, we have a grinder. Except that it's used exclusively for espresso coffee grinding. I know, again, coffee snobs, right? Just for the record - the espresso thing is ALL LANCE. And also just for the record, he gave some to Morgan the other day?! Just a sip, but still. We both clearly have a strong attachment to caffeine - so why start her off at such an early age? Even if she is protesting that all her friends drink coffee (really??!!). But that is neither here nor there. The point is, what I was looking for was not there. Bummer. Ghetto coffee maker lives on.

On to the next thing. What was it? Oh dear.

"Morgan, what else is on our list?"
"A fly hitter"

Ahh, yes. I stop and consider where a fly swatter might be. Given that they are fairly simple things and normal people don't break them very often, it's been quite a while since I've had to purchase one. Maybe with the outdoorsy/hardware stuff? I go look there and they aren't there. Oh, I know. The garden section. I head out there and the guy working there steers me over to the cleaning products aisle? Ummm. Okay. Apparently there is an end cap I should find them on. Walking down the aisle at Target, I quickly see what he's talking about. A large end cap with mouse traps and ant spray and things of the "pest control" genre. But, to my dismay, no fly swatters. By the time I'm done looking in this location, Morgan is asking WAY too many questions about mouse traps and how they work. And why mice go in them. And what happens to them when they do. And why people catch them. And why sometimes people have them as pets. And why sometimes snakes eat them.

In a last ditch effort to get the heck out of dodge, I ask another kind associate if they could point me in the right direction. He didn't speak English very well, so I gave him the international sign for fly swatter, say FLY really slowly and making a swift hitting motion down while saying swatter. "Ahh! Yes! This way!" And to my horror, he walks me through the aisle of dishes, down to the aisle where they have all the kitchen gadgets and utensils hanging on the wall and points to the wall.

I'm standing there speechless, because it would NEVER occur to me to look in this section of the store. Seriously? Let's see....I'll take an apple corer, a paper towel holder, and OH YEAH, the big thing that you smash flies with and gets all smeared up with their guts. Just thinking about it makes me gag. Maybe I'm odd. I mean, I realize that they aren't USED fly swatters. But still. I've always known that I'm a "cataloger" and that certain things just DO NOT go with other things. Like eggs on top of peanut butter waffles (honey, you know that's just disgusting). This would be one of them.

Ick!

My husband, the computer geek

My husband does not answer the phone. Ever. Except if he sees it's me, and then only out of fear of my yelling. So, it comes as no surprise that when I got home from the tennis club tonight, there was a message that had just been left on our voice mail. I listen to the message and it's a friend of Morgan's who has invited her for a pool party on Sunday. Not knowing whether or not we could go and wanting to discuss it with my husband without sensitive ears hearing before we decided, I began the conversation.

Me: "I see we got a call that you didn't answer while I was gone."
Lance: "Oh...yeah. I forgot about that."
Me: "Did you listen to the message?"
Lance: "What message? I didn't know who it was. It's not someone I know. They left a message?"
Me: (laughing) "Yeah, there was a message. It's someone you know."
Lance: "Who was it?"
Me: "T-A-T-E-apostrophe-S M-O-M"
Lance: *blank stare*
Me: *blank stare back*
Lance: "I wasn't ready for spelling. My mind was not formatted for that. Invalid input!"

Wake up! I have a SURPRISE for YOU!

I'm not sure what was going on with Bennett the past two mornings, when he decided to get up way earlier than I like, but luckily he's back to his normal 7:30-8:00 wake up schedule today. Funny how you get used to things, huh? He used to be a 7am sharp kind of guy, but after returning home from Florida, this morphed into 8am. I wasn't about to complain since the little stinker goes to bed at 7:30 and was still sleeping in. So, when he was up at 6:30 yesterday and 6 (!!) the day before, imagine my irritation. It's kind of like when they start sleeping through the night. And you KNOW they can. And then they don't. And you get all agitated and start arguing with a baby about "what do you want now?" I don't think I'm alone here on this. Right?!?

On Monday I had planned to get up BEFORE they woke up, but the little bugger beat my alarm. Yesterday, I was exhausted and just figured I'd sleep until they woke up. So, when he woke up at 6:30, I wasn't HAPPY per se, but I made lemonade! Off we went to the gym before the little crazies had the sleep wiped out of their eyes. Ha! That will show you!

This morning, Morgan decided that she wanted to wake me up at 7:30 because she had a "SURPRISE for YOU!". She's practically screaming at the top of her lungs as she starts jumping on my bed. Wiping the drool off my forearm, I informed her that it was rude to wake me up (is there a better way to explain that the unnatural way she wakes me up is NOT GOOD?!) I got up and quickly made a decision. No gym today. I was channeling my friend, Melissa, who doesn't do the exercise thing - she's one of THOSE people. Those naturally thin people. Ick! ;) "My muscles are too sore to work out today. Melissa wouldn't want me to work out. WWMD". So I grabbed a quick shower before Bennett started screaming for me and headed downstairs to see the SURPRISE for YOU. Apparently my oldest was bored out of her mind this morning because she decided to prep breakfast for everyone. She had slung a bib over Bennett's high chair and put a Gogurt on his tray. She had gotten down two coffee cups and a glass for her milk. I know it's should be sweet and all; her taking the initiative to take care of the family -- her clearly modeling my behavior. But, seriously? She had to wake me up for this??

So instead, we enjoyed a leisurely breakfast and off to playgroup. Where it turned like 150 degrees outside, suddenly, without warning. Okay, maybe there was a warning. I haven't watched the news in AGES. But, seriously? It was a very pleasant 75 degrees during mid-day on Monday. Who knew it was going to warm up so fast? Yeah, I know. NBC11. So, we'll go to the tennis club for swimming before Morgan's lessons and hopefully wear them out so that tomorrow? We sleep until 8. :)

Hi. My name is Paige. I love you.

Okay, so there are two people at the club that I'm totally loving right now. One is an instructor of some of the classes I'm taking and the other works in the kids' game room and nursery.

The class instructor teaches a wide variety of classes and I've been fortunate enough to show up for a lot of hers lately. The latest being the cardio & core class I took this morning. Now, the first class I took of hers, cardio kickboxing, should have given me a warning on how this woman operates, but I wasn't sure if it was standard fare for her class, or what. The first class I took, she had us do some kickboxing stuff in the classroom first and then she moved us to the indoor track. Only, how do you think we got there? Walking? Nooooo. Running? Hardly. How about some sideways lunges, passing a medicine ball back and forth to your partner. But that was only the prelude to the big event. Once we got to the indoor track (upstairs) one of the partners had to run five laps while the other went up and down the stairs with the medicine ball over their head. Like a bazillion times. Until the partner was done running. When I was running, I ran fast; I did not want to make my partner work so hard climbing the stairs until I was done! Not sure what my partner was thinking when it was HER turn to run. Anyhooo...that was the first class I took of hers.

Today's class was cardio & core. We got warmed up in the classroom, and again hit the indoor track. Only this time, we took weights with us and did some arm work while walking a brisk pace around the track. And when we were done with that, it was up and down the stairs. And when that was over, wall squats. Then back to the classroom for core work. She had four stations set up. Medicine balls to pull across your body to work your obliques, exercise balls for sit ups, some crazy station where you had to jump to plank position and back up, a BOSU balance ball where you had to stand ON TOP of it and do squats with a kick in front in between. NOT EASY, people! After spending one minute on each station, we headed back to the indoor track. We went there her favorite way, with the medicine ball squat passes to our partner. We repeated the five laps and stairs partner work, only this time we ran one lap, shuffled to the right for one, ran another, shuffled to the left for another, ran another one, and THEN for the severely clumsy paranoid person inside us all, we ran the last lap BACKWARDS. All the while our partner was up and down the stairs with the medicine ball over their head. You would think we'd be done, right? WRONG. Back to the classroom for another round at the stations. This time the medicine ball was used for straight curl sit ups, the exercise ball for crossover sit ups, more of the plank stuff, and then balancing on top of the BOSU while rotating our toes in a clockwise position from 12 o'clock to 6 o'clock and back. THEN we went back to the track to do a quick run of another five laps. Needless to say, I was very sweating and a fair bit tired when the class was finally over. But, I LOVE this feeling! And I know I'm getting a great workout because she mixes it up so much. My mom has a personal trainer who is so awesome (read: regularly kicks my butt when I'm there), named Jane. This woman is Jane if Jane was teaching group exercise classes. Yeah, so you KNOW she's hardcore! (Jane, please don't try to one up her next time I see you! I am sure you are WAY better. You don't have to prove it to ME. Maybe to my Mom. Just a little. )

The other person that I'm just LOVING at the club is the one who works in the kids' game room and nursery. I've been watching her off and on for the few weeks we've been going. (No, I'm NOT stalking her). She's very smart and really, really great with the kids. She looks to be about 16 or 17. I'm already thinking about asking her if she babysits. Only I feel all weird. Like I'm asking her on a date or something. I don't know how to do this! I'm sure she gets this a lot - working with the kids at the club. I bet she also gets paid a lot. Yeah, she's that good. How do I even go about this? What if she doesn't want to babysit my kids? How will I take the rejection? Oh the drama! LOL

Here's to a positive attitude

I kept things positive and low stress today and we had a blast! We went to the Lawrence Hall of Science. I was worried that there wouldn't be anything for Bennett to do, but there was an area for kids kindergarten and under that he had a BLAST in. There was a big circle of foam blocks that the kids went nuts in. With his recent fascination with balls, he was totally digging the big thing that you could throw balls into and watch them spin down through the hole in the bottom. There were different kinds of mirrors and a puppet theatre also. Morgan enjoyed this area quite a bit, too, but there was so much more for her to do in the other exhibits.






Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

Hello miniature version of ME in the middle pictures. That's scary.

In an unexpected turn of events, we even got home early enough for naps before swim lessons and some spare time for moi. Nice!

Enjoying the day like a child

Yesterday was a nice low-key day. Church in the morning for all, home for lunch and then naptime. Lance and I watched Jumper while the kids slept and they woke up right after it was over. After naps and snack, we headed out to walk to a nearby-ish park (about a mile and a half away). The kids slid down the slides, swang on the swings, and even climbed some trees and then it was time to head home. We had leftovers for dinner, so there wasn't a mess to clean up. Kids went to bed and then Lance and I got caught up on Big Brother 10.

Now, today? Likely to be a different story. I have another outing for the kids planned. As much as I love taking them to these cool places, the fact of the matter is that it's a tiring process. Packing stuff up. Packing them up. Driving there. Getting everything situated in the stroller. Snack time. Lunch time. Nap time. Cranky time. Arguing time. Crying time. Drive back. Have no time left for the day to do stuff that needs to be done. Swim lessons. Rush around in a panic trying to throw dinner together only to wish it were 8pm already so I can sit on my butt and veg in front of the TV.

For one day, though, I'm going to try to chill out. I'm going to get there when I get there. I'm going to try to let ungrateful comments roll off my back. I'm going to put a roast in the crock pot before we leave so I don't have to rush for dinner and I'm going to pack stuff for the gym/swim lessons so that if we need to go straight there, we can. I've gotten the toilets cleaned already and I'll run the Roomba while we're gone.

And I'm going to try to put myself in their shoes today. And try to enjoy the day the way they do.

Fun at the gym

I sort of have this history of humor associated with the gym, that goes way back. Like the time that I drove 45 minutes to work early one morning so that I could get my workout done before I got started on my day. Except that I left my work clothes at home. Or when I previously had this crazy irrational fear of the treadmill and then proceeded to FALL OFF the one at the gym. Next to people. Who then later came to a party we were throwing at our house. Oh yeah, I remember when I accidentally locked myself out of the shower room at work and had to stick my head out (with the towel around my body) to see if I could get the receptionist to unlock the locker room for me. I think that happened twice.

Sometimes, the humor has nothing to do with me. Like the guy that used to follow me around our gym at work, using equipment RIGHT NEXT to me. But, I think the funniest thing to happen in the context of exercise happened this morning at my cardio kickboxing class.

The class was pretty full when a woman walked in and said hello to the instructor. We're in the middle of our warm-up, doing jabs and upper cuts to our imaginary predator. Not too long after this, I hear this noise "shhhhuuuussshhhhh" "shhhhuuuussshhhhh" "shhhhuuuussshhhhh" and it seems to be in synch with the moves we are making. Upper cut "shhhhuuuussshhhhh", jab "shhhhuuuussshhhhh", uppercut "shhhhuuuussshhhhh", jab "shhhhuuuussshhhhh".

I finally realize where the noise is coming from. The woman who came into the class late is making these noises as she is CLEARLY kicking the CRAP out of her imaginary predator. Her face was all serious and Rocky-esque. She was kicking some butt! I looked around and NOBODY else seemed to notice!?! Or if they do, they are able to control themselves much better than I am. I am trying so hard to contain my grin. "Shhhhuuuussshhhhh" "shhhhuuuussshhhhh" "shhhhuuuussshhhhh". I wanted so desperatly to shout out "hiiiiyaaah!", but managed to do it only inside my head.

The rest of the class, this woman was like in a trance. I started to wonder if she maybe had an imaginary friend that she was hitting and kicking. Whoever it was, she was PISSED.

I need to look at these pictures every day

These pictures make days like today a little more bearable. If I'm reminded that while neither of my children may be very good at showing gratitude, they do seem to have a good time when I take them to places like I did yesterday.

Today, with nothing on the agenda, I planned a low-key day at home. Play time with the kids, getting stuff done around the house, laundry, etc. Except that the five-year-old decided to whine and complain all day about what she's RATHER be doing. Then, she and her co-hort, the fifteen-month-old, decided to UNDO everything I was doing. Oh, are you on the phone? Shall I start SCREAMING? What, Mom? Are you trying to fold laundry? Well let me start pulling it off of the table where you've placed it, all neatly folded. What is that, you are trying to do? Clean the floors in my room? Maybe I should then bring all possible toys out and into your way.

THEN, after barely making it through lunch, I got them both down for their naps and had *just* finished mopping the entry way and kitchen floors when the doorbell rings and the Comcast guy shows up to take a look at the cable modem I had called about earlier. Wanna know where that is? In the closet in Bennett's room. Yeah, nice placement. So, obviously this ushered in the end of Bennett's nap and then I had to spend the rest of the time the Comcast guy was here trying to keep Bennett out of his tools, out of his way, and most importantly, out of the hole in the floor of his closet that leads to the crawlspace under the house. Just as the Comcast guy left, guess who got up? Yep, so now they were both up.

In some sort of self-defense move, I decided that we'd just go over to the club early for Morgan's swim lessons. After MUCH herding, some timeouts, Morgan getting sent to her room for slamming the door in Bennett's face and some stern talking (read: yelling), we got in the car and were headed over to the club. I was actually looking forward to the blessed half hour that Morgan would be occupied by her class and Bennett would be in the nursery. I even brought a book to read! We get there and drop Bennett off at the nursery and head out to the pool. And NO ONE is there. Yep, no swim lessons on Fridays. Seems I recall that, now that I think about it. Load the kids back home and consider locking myself in my bedroom when we get home to get through the next 45 minutes or so before I need to start dinner.

No such luck. Bennett's into everything, Morgan is back to her room and there's still stuff I needed to get done that I couldn't get done at nap time (hard to do when there's hardly a nap time). Then it's time to cook dinner and by this time, I'm thinking that as soon as Lance walks in the door, I just might walk out. I actually packed up a bag to go work out. Except that when I actually get a chance to sit down and eat dinner, I realize how extremely tired I am.

How can this be? What did I do today?

Everything I didn't get done yesterday because I took the kids on the all day excursion yesterday. And just like that, it's all forgotten. The good times, the fun we had, the smiles on their faces. Because "she took my toy" and "I promise to share" and "I'll touch this thing you told me 10000 times before not to touch" is all that I can remember now. Good thing I took so many pictures. :)

The best laid plans...

I was very excited to bring the kids back to the Bay Area Discovery Museum in Sausalito. We went last summer, when Bennett was just a newborn and it was sooo cool. I knew both of them would have a blast this year. I had everything prepared last night, so that we could just get dressed, eat breakfast and then get out the door. I had planned to wake up around 7ish to start the process, so when Bennett woke up around 6:45 this morning, I just got up and got the day started.

Having showered and put my clothes out the night before, I just needed to get up, get dressed, throw some make-up on and I'd be ready to go. It took me all of 15 minutes to do this and make the bed. I headed downstairs to get Bennett up. He had soaked through his diaper (which is probably why he woke up early), so I went ahead and got him dressed in the clothes I had picked out yesterday. During this time, Morgan also woke up, so I asked her to get dressed in the clothes that had already been picked out. By 8:15, both kids were dressed! Breakfast time! Morgan wanted cereal and Bennett wanted pancakes. No problemo. With the kids eating, I scarf down my breakfast and start packing up the car. Lunches that were packed last night, check. Diaper bag that was stocked with a week's worth of snacks, check. DVD player for Morgan to watch on the way there (so as to avoid so many "when are we going to be there?" questions), check.

Everything is packed in the car and Bennett is still sitting there in his highchair. With THE look on his face. One I know all too well. I now understand it to mean, "Mom, I'm sitting in a big steamy nasty pile of poop". So I get him cleaned up and take him to his room to change his diaper, only to discover that there is poop peeking out the leg of his diaper. And smeared on his shorts. Of course, pulling the shorts off a fidgety child like mine only makes things worse. By this time, he has poop smeared all the way down his leg. And junk in his JUNK, if you know what I mean.

If you have a little boy, you will know what is coming next. They just can't resist checking things out during the diaper changes, and of course, with JUNK on your JUNK.....yeah, well. So, now I'm freaking out that my child has POOP FINGERS. I don't think I've ever grabbed a wipe so fast, but I wipe his hands just as a temporary measure until I can get him cleaned up enough for a bath. Yes, that's when you know it's bad. When you have to clean them up for a bath. Of course, while I'm getting his lower region cleaned up, I'm battling this stubborn one of mine to PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT PUT YOUR FINGERS IN YOUR MOUTH. Too late! Trying not to gag, I bring my poop machine into the bathroom, where Morgan has so helpfully pulled out the baby soap and towel and all. Bathtime takes care of the poop and then I get him dressed. Again. In an outfit that I didn't pick out last night.

Of course, with all the excitement, Morgan had forgotten about getting her teeth brushed and shoes on and by this time, I'm ready to leave. NOW. If you know me, you know that when I'm ready to go, it's time to go. Which doesn't always mesh well with a five year old's pace. But, we finally made it out the door, about an hour later than we could have. Had I not needed to improvise on my very carefully planned morning.

Just goes to show me...

But, we got there, had a great time and I have lots of great pictures. Coming soon!

Boys are weird

I almost forgot the hilarious observation Morgan made this morning as she was helping me make my bed.

"Boys don't wear pajamas. They sleep naked."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, they just wear their underwear. That's what boys do. They are weird."

Newsflash: Shopping without kids is good for sanity, but not for wallet

I took advantage of Lance working from home yesterday to do my big Costco trip without the accompanying "he touched me" or sippy cup throwing that comes like a package deal with my two kids. I was sort of on a timeline since I wanted to be back before they woke up, so that Lance wouldn't be interrupted from his work. But, I also sort of had time to peruse. And did I peruse!

I started in the dry foods section and had at least five items in my buggy (yes, it's a buggy, not a shopping cart - I'm from the south, people!) before I even got to the main reason for the trip - produce, dairy and meat. I need MORE snack options. Ooohhh, look. There's fruit leather. That will be good for the kids. Oh wait, dried apricots without sugar added? Excellent choice! CRAISINS will make a nice change of pace from the raisins! Apparently I am afraid that we are going to run out of dried fruit! And am also trying to give my kids the shits...although I will say that it made it easier this morning to convince Morgan to try to eat oatmeal when she had all these "goodies" to put in there.

So, I spent probably at least $30 more than I normally would have if I'd had the kids there with me. It's a total survival mission when they are with me. Get in and get out. Only the essentials. Maybe that's not such a bad thing.

Oatmeal for breakfast

It's going to be a while before we try this again...

The holy grail of parenting

What a day! I'm sitting and relaxing for the first time since 8 this morning. Doctor appointment, soccer practice, playtime at the park, lunch, chores, trip to Costco, swim lessons, kickboxing class, dinner, free ice cream cones for the kids at Weinerschnitzel and finally now. My favorite time of the day!

The day started off with Morgan's five year checkup. Yes, she picked me. No, I'm certain it wasn't because when she was making her decision, I was all waving my arms and pointing at me, mouthing "me, me". That had nothing to do with it. Anyway - height and weight are right on track. She is trending more towards my height and will probably be somewhere around 5' 6" or 5'7", fully grown (so still shorter than me, but close to my height). We talked about starting Kindergarten and what to expect with regards to behavior. Apparently, it's going to get worse before it gets better. The pediatrician said that the first six months or so of Kindergarten are tough because she's now exposed to a broader, more diverse crowd, who's parenting styles and rules may be quite different than ours. He said that she's going to have a hard time with it and will likely try to get away with what she sees her classmates getting away with. He said it normally takes until February or March for parents to get their kids reigned in. OH HAPPY DAY! He said it's a repeat when they start first grade, but it only takes a month to get back on top of it because they remember. He says that 2nd through 4th graders are the best. Maybe we can just fast forward a few years?? No? Aww, you guys are no fun!

During this discussion, I brought up the fact that we've already talked about the fact that others have different rules, but that doesn't change our rules. The doctor agreed with me and I saw the expression on Morgan's face turn to pure defeat. I know that this is only temporary and that she's going to be testing us for the better part of a YEAR (someone pass me the wine), but it was good to see SOMETHING sink in.

We talked about the lying, attitude, tone of voice, disrespectful issues that we've been dealing with lately. He says that she's old enough to realize that she's lying and that it's not okay, however it is normal. He reinforced, for the little girl's listening ears, that it's not okay and that there should be consequences for lying.

We also talked about the fact that Morgan will sometimes regress into baby talk, and he attributes this to being the oldest. He explained to me how hard it is to be the oldest and to have to be more responsible, and that sometimes she thinks that if she acts like a baby she'll be able to get away with stuff. I just laughed. I told him that whenever she talks like a baby, I tell her that I'm not going to talk to her like that and if she wants to talk to me like a five year old, we'll talk. He smiled and said that's exactly what I should do. (*whew*). We also touched on the fact that she gravitates towards older kids (I did also). He let me know that for now, it's okay. He said around 4th grade is when I need to start being concerned. He said that's when it usually starts to cause a problem for girls (that's when it did for me too). Hello apple that has not fallen far from my tree.

Then I hit him with the one that really grates my nerves so badly. It's a tough one because while you want your child to be self-confident, you also want to teach them modesty and being considerate of others. And at this age, this seems really hard to teach. I've explained to Morgan that when she brags about something she can do or has done to someone else, that she might make them feel bad. I've explained to her that sometimes it's even nicer for someone to recognize something she's done WITHOUT HER SHOVING IT IN THEIR FACE. She just doesn't really seem to get it and I'm nearly at a loss as to new things to try. We want her to have confidence in herself, but in the right way. So, after I pour this all out on the table for the doctor to consider, he makes a passing comment that I'm SURE didn't go unheard by a certain five year old.

He said, "Well, this is going to be an issue for her. I'm sure she will be a lot smarter, a lot prettier, a lot taller, a lot more....than other kids."

And then I thought to myself: My daughter is the smartest, prettiest, tallest, best! Wow!!

I know it's wrong. I know I should be downplaying it and be all humble and "oh, no she's just average" and stuff. But, as a parent, isn't this pretty much the holy grail?? From a DOCTOR nonetheless. Haha! Okay, okay. I'm mature enough to have kept these thoughts in my head (at least until now), but MAN, was that good to hear!

He helped me emphasize what I've been working with her, so as to not let those comments get too firmly planted in her head, by letting her know that she only needs to worry about what she is doing and she doesn't need to brag to other people about what she's able to do. At this point, though, I'm not sure she was listening.

With all our questions answered, it was time to get on with the main show. Urine sample, a needle stick anemia test, four shots, and a TB prick test. BRING IT ON. :) Lance worked from home today so that I didn't have to bring Bennett with me to the appointment. That was a BIG help.

1. Urine sample. Who knew that this concept caused such "stage fright" for little ones? The doctor even warned me that most kids can't do it the first time. Well, we're not dealing with most kids, now are we? Urine sample done.

2. Anemia test was fairly painless and Morgan really liked watching the blood come out of her finger. Weird.

3. Four shots. Okay, this is where I look at my daughter and go, huh? This girl who cries if the wind accidentally blows a leaf the wrong way across her leg? She didn't cry AT ALL for any of the shots. By the last one, she was definitely all antsy and all no, no. But she took them all like a champ and didn't cry at all. Not one little tear. Hooray!

4. TB test. Nearly killed her. LOL! I realized, though, that she was watching this big needle go into her arm and that can't be good. As soon as she looked away, she was all good.

Hey Kindergarten?? We're ready!!

Lost files and programs

So, it's not the files I lost in The Great Hard Drive Crash of '08 that have me frustrated right now. The only one that I really care that much about is my fancy spreadsheet that I've been entering actuals vs. budget for our household budget all year. And, really, not that big of a deal; I can just recreate it. It's the tedious task of "recreating" my perfect laptop that's really frustrating.

I had it organized the way I like it. I had all the right applications installed, all the right icons there, background picture set up, etc. And it's a long process of recreating that. Luckily, after our outing to the local lake/beach this morning, both kids have been sleeping for almost three hours. I still don't have everything back on here that I want/need, but it's getting there.

Oh, and can I please just profess my undying love of Google Toolbar? So glad I was using this before, as all my bookmarks reappeared when I downloaded it this afternoon. LOVE IT!

Proof that my son is a stubborn little stinker

Bennett is now firmly on the path of timeouts. He's had more than I can even count today for constantly touching everything. The Wii. The Roomba. The TV. Morgan. The fireplace. You name something he's not supposed to touch and he will gladly go over and lay a hand on it.

This alone is not the proof.

The fact that he LAUGHS at me when I give him a firm warning, "Bennett don't touch Morgan!" and then smiles as he touches her ever so lightly with one finger, all the while watching you. That is the proof.

And then? When he runs, laughing the whole way, down the hall as I go to put him in a timeout for touching her. Oh also? When he tries to "hide" behind the closet pocket at the end of the hall. Of course, also when he throws himself down on the ground, turning into a wet noodle so you can't pick him up for his timeout.

That is all the proof you need.

Pass the therapy, please.

Seeking responsible person for time alone with hubby

Please do not alert the responsible parent society, but we have been out, sans kids, for TWO whole nights this week. That's right. We just ditched them and went out on the town. Not once, but TWICE. Thursday to the fondue place and last night for a couples game night. We thoroughly enjoyed both nights out, especially since they are so few and far between.

With no grandparents in town to dote on the kids when we want some time alone, Lance and I have to use our babysitter time preciously. To add to the complication, my niece who has been our primary babysitter is now working. And on SATURDAY nights, too. I know! She totally didn't even consult us on her plans! How dare she! ;) So, now comes to the time to find another, probably not-related-to-us babysitter. That is, if we ever want to go out alone. And trust me, we aren't like these other parents that would really rather be at home with the kids. We like to go out, just the two of us.

The thing is? I really don't know how to find the right babysitter. Especially now that we have two kids with varying needs. I've always relied on my niece, some friends, or just waiting until grandma was in town. But I just think that we're gonna have to bite the bullet and just find a somewhat standing babysitter. I'm not even sure the best way to do this. Do I put some sort of ad out there? Married parents seek responsible, fun, smart, loving, inexpensive person who is available at our beck and call to watch our sassy daughter and therapy-inducing son. Oh yeah. I can practically hear them pounding down the door as we speak.

Why can't I find someone like ME when I was in high school? Oh man, I was good. I sought out parents who needed babysitters. Yeah. I'd see bikes in the front yard and think "BINGO!" I even got a standing job that way with some parents who lived down the street from us. Every Saturday night, I got paid, whether they went out or not. Just for the dependability of having me available. Now, I certainly can't afford an arrangement like that, especially not with the cost of a good sitter these days, but oh man. Once a month, even, would be nice.

An option that Lance offered was to put them in the nursery at the tennis club and relax on some comfy couches there and just hang out. How sad are we?

My heart can't handle my son

Seriously? I am on pins and needles anytime we are around anything remotely dangerous. It soooooo wasn't like this with Morgan. But the boy? Yeah, he likes to walk through the water and then stick his face UNDER it. Why? Just because. Then he laughs as I'm grabbing my heart up off the ground. I'm pretty sure he's laughing at me all the while thinking "look at what I'm doing to my mother!" And he keeps throwing himself back. AS IF HE KNOWS HOW TO FLOAT. Except he doesn't.

Morgan, on the other hand, who has the capability to swim now, will NOT go where she can't touch. Seriously. Night and day these two.

We had another play date for incoming kindergartners this morning and then after went to the club for some swim time. Luckily this time Lance got to witness the boy's craziness all for himself. And of course, being a typical Dad, would LET him venture into the area where he's barely got his chin out of the water and watch him drink in water. That's when I took my overly cautious daughter to the big pool. My heart just couldn't take it anymore!

Summer Time Fun

After what seems like a hectic week, between camp, soccer, doctor's appointments, birthdays, playgroups, anniversaries, etc., I decided that we would (gasp) STAY HOME this morning. Which is pretty much the same as me saying "I needed to get some stuff done around the house". So, to keep the kids busy while I folded a large load of laundry, I taught them something new - I showed them how to build a fort! Another childhood memory handed down to the next generation :)

Morgan immediately caught on and quickly went and grabbed pillows and blankets. This is pretty much her way of playing, down to the "cage" they were in. Bennett, on the other hand, wasn't quite sure what to make of it until he saw Morgan going in and out a few times. THEN, he got it and started to have a blast! Good times! He even decided to give laying down on the pillow a try after seeing Morgan do it. Too bad he didn't put himself down for a nap.

After all the fun was over (read: Morgan kept pulling the blanket down over Bennett's head while he screamed bloody murder), it was time to get Morgan ready for her last day at camp. She's had so much fun this week going to camp. The highlight so far was yesterday. Not when they brought live animals to show the kids. Oh no. When they played the BEST! GAME! EVER!, or so Morgan says. It involved whipped cream over some gummy worms that the kids had to dig out of a bowl with only their mouths. BEST! GAME! EVER! Anyway - today is the last day and because the theme of the camp is Animal Kingdom, they asked the kids to dress up as an animal today. I'm proud to introduce you to my FIERCE daughter, the TIGER!

I'm particularly fond of the crinkle in her nose. :) When I asked her if she thought her camp counselors would realize she's not a tiger, she thought for a moment and then announced that they would know it wasn't really a tiger because she wasn't wearing and orange shirt. Oops. Oh, she doesn't have fur! That's how they'll know. On the drive there, she told me that she wished she could run as fast as a tiger. I told her that she was a pretty fast runner, to which she responded, "well, I really wish I could run on four legs". When we got to camp, she was carrying her snack bag and asked if I could please carry it, she's having trouble - what with her claws and all. :)

Just to set the record straight...

I don't often send my bloggings to my husband or ask that he read my blabberings. But given that yesterday was our anniversary and that I'd outwardly professed my love and devotion to him in a very public manner, I sent him a little email with a link to my blog with a quick note saying Happy Anniversary. See you tonight. Love, P.

So, he reads it, comments "you're welcome" and that's it, right?

Well, he gets home from work and my visions of the kids sleeping in bed and me standing fully dressed in a strapless gown in the dining room with candles lit and Billie Holiday playing in the background when he arrived home, had already disintegrated into me standing at the top of the stairs in a towel with my hair dripping as I'm yelling down at the kids "Morgan WHAT are you doing?? Are you done YET?? Bennett WHAT did you just throw from your highchair??" as I'm frantically trying to get ready and get the kids fed simultaneously. Did I mention that the lobster tail that I was planning to use in the dish I was going to make for us was still thawing in the sink?

Anyhooooo - he walks in and heads upstairs where I instantly abandon plan A and go straight into plan B. See, I had already made reservations at a local fondue place for dessert and had already arranged for my niece to come hang out while the kids slept. Only, we could actually go and have a complete dinner that neither one of us had to cook and one that I didn't have to rush through getting ready for. After a few moments of discussion, the decision was made and the lobster tail was packed back up and put in the refrigerator for another night. I continue getting ready, he bathes Bennett and puts him to bed while Morgan is showering upstairs and I'm getting ready. Lance comes upstairs to shave and announces that my blog entry was long. I asked him if he liked it and he said he did. Then we were distracted by a certain 5 year old who was stalling bedtime in the hopes that she'd catch a glimpse of her cousin.

After getting to the restaurant, we pick the conversation back up and he told me that he COULDN'T BELIEVE I told everyone about the radar detector. To which I stated the obvious. I've already told everyone. Duh! I ask him if his recollection of the events were the same as mine. He tells me that they are, for the most part, but that I was REALLY emphatic about my resistance to him. I told him that it was a historical truth. He also tried to debate me on the fact that he was eating a hamburger off a paper plate when I woke up that day, but some things are just etched in your memory forever and that is one that will forever be etched in mine. I know, it's so romantic and all, it would be hard for me to forget, right?

So the conversation leads to me asking him about how often he reads my blog. Whenever I send him a link. *blink**blink*. I decided then and there (and I told him so, too) that I'm going to start fabricating things about him, or worse, TELL THE FULL TRUTH, to make sure he's paying attention. I think it's only fair that if I'm the one recording our family's history, he should at least review it. Don't you think?

In that vein, last night, he farted in his sleep twice in a row. REALLY LOUD.

We had a wonderful, four-course dinner last night without any "quit throwing food" and "EAT!" comments necessary. Okay, well maybe only once or twice.

Yin and Yang

My husband is often hit or miss with his gestures of love and appreciation. There was that time that he gave me a RADAR DETECTOR for Valentine's Day. Not only do I hate the annoying noises that they make and didn't really need one, but c'mon. A radar detector for a girl?? And I'm a girly girl, too. Obviously, not hitting the mark, he gave it another shot and after hearing me say repeatedly every night that winter how I wish I could warm up my side of the bed before I got into it, he got me an electric blanket for St. Patrick's Day. You read that right. And not able to find any appropriate wrapping paper, he actually got a St. Patty's Day tablecloth to utilize for the occasion. What am I going to remember about that whole thing? Not really the radar detector, but the fact that he made it up to me with the electric blanket. That, in a nutshell, is my husband.

This morning, I woke up to this on the kitchen counter, with a lovely card that expressed to me that the best thing about him was ME (did your knees go weak too?). You know what this is, people? This is an ORCHID. Which is clearly a very nice gesture from my husband. You know what his gesture says? It says, "I have faith in my wife". I'm well known across this country for my ability to kill any living plant. So, obviously, my husband has faith in me to give me an ORCHID of all things. :) I love it!

Nine years ago today, I married my best friend. Some of you reading this right now were there to witness our special day. Some of you have come into our lives afterwards. Most of you know how we met, but I'll tell our tale here for anyone who may have accidentally stumbled across this sappy profession of love.

I was going to school in Auburn, AL. I met one of my best friends there while we were working at the local mall. I worked at a toy store and she worked at a shoe store. We became fast friends and she introduced me to all things related to this new frontier - the world wide web! She met her soon-to-be boyfriend on mIRC (oh yeah, we're old school!) and she flew out to California and met him. Things seemed to go really well and before I knew it, she was graduating and moving across the country to be with him. She needed someone to drive in the U-Haul with her and who is crazy enough to do that? *looks around*. Yeah, I guess that would be me. We'd already taken lots of road trips together (one trip to Texas with "Just Married" painted in shoe polish on the back of my car -- with it still on my car, my parents were less than impressed with this when they came up for a surprise visit to Auburn and couldn't be certain that I had NOT actually gotten married). This was going to be just another road trip! Three or four days across the grand ole USA.

Now, the whole trip out to California was quite an adventure. We're talking broken down U-Haul's, no air conditioning, etc. But, throughout the trip, my friend kept telling me about her boyfriend's roommate, Lance. I had been "single" for the better part of two years, after a really bad experience with my ex-fiance. I had been with him for something like five years? Which in teenage/young adult years is practically a life time. I was not interested in settling back down anytime soon. I was rather enjoying playing the field and had lots of stories of the many guys in Auburn I dated. Oh the stories! Anyhow - I wasn't looking for a guy, certainly not one in California.

After a very loooooong trip to California, we landed at her boyfriend's apartment and crashed. And I do mean crashed. Gosh, that would be TWELVE YEARS AGO TODAY. I woke up on a strange couch, looked around and I saw this guy, sitting in a rocking chair, quietly eating a hamburger on a paper plate. This was my first vision of my husband. I know, romantic, right?? Hands off, ladies - he's all mine! Anyhow. I sit up and he says "You must be Paige". Thank goodness the stranger in this strange place that I was just sleeping at least knows my name. Yes, that's me. He introduces himself as Lance.

At first glance, I could not understand why my friend, the one who had SEEN the guys I was dating, had figured that I'd be interested in Lance. He was NOTHING like the guys I had been dating. The guys I dated were all very athletic (ahh, the tennis dates!), dark hair, and MUCH taller than me. I never dated someone who I could look them in the eyes if I just stood on the tips of my toes in the slightest. WHAT A RELIEF. No worries about having to deal with a long distance relationship or any of that mess.

Except, you know what? Looking back, he started working on me in a quiet way. I spent the rest of my week in California hanging out with this really cool guy. I love to tell the story about how we celebrated his birthday while I was there. They had this big party for him. And you know where he was? With me. Just talking. And talking. And talking. They actually had to come find us so that he could blow out the candles on his cake. But, soooo not my type. This is what I kept telling myself. Looking back, I can see that I was trying to convince myself. Because if he was my type, that would really make things complicated.

I went back to Alabama at the end of that week and I felt empty. I had fallen in love with the area in California, but I believe that it was more than just California that was calling me back. Speaking of calling, this man who now NEVER talks on the phone? We talked on the phone every day. For hours. Until one day, I made up my mind that I was moving to California. This was when my parents paid me the surprise visit because they didn't understand WHY on EARTH I would up and move 3000 miles away from all my friends and family. But, California really suits me. And, obviously, I had stuff to do out here. Like marry my soul mate.

So, I moved out to California and eventually, Lance and I got engaged and nine years ago today, three years after the day that I woke up on that couch and met him for the first time, with his hands all greasy from the hamburger, we got married in a small redwood grove in Saratoga, California.

You know why I married him? Because where I'm inpatient, he has patience. He loves me for exactly who I am, remarkably, even when that changes (sometimes on an hourly basis). He has never asked me to change who I am or do something different. He has unconditional acceptance of me, and for someone with my past, that means a lot to me. When I'm flying off the handle and overly upset, he's equally overly calm. When I'm ready to make a big step (buying a car, a house, having a baby, etc), he accepts my nudging, all the while, keeping me grounded. We've always talked about how we fit together. We go together because we are so different in so many ways, but also have so much in common. He's the yin to my yang.

Nine years ago, I married my best friend in a small wedding, surrounded by family and friends. It is one of my favorite memories from my life. It's cataloged there between memories like meeting him for the first time, buying our house, and bringing home our daughter and our son. There are also some harder memories in there. Ones that have really tested the foundation of our relationship. That's what happens in marriages. I'm glad to be married to my best friend, who is able to stick things out and work hard at this thing we now call our life and our family. This is what life is supposed to be. I'm so lucky and so blessed to have these memories. All of them. Here's to many more!

Thinking about responsibility

At Bennett's 15 month checkup yesterday, I made Morgan's 5 year checkup appointment. It was a little bit difficult, logistically, since the doctor had already advised us to make sure that we are able to give her 100% of our attention at this visit since she's getting all her kindergarten shots. So, I scheduled the appointment for next week and Lance is working from home. After I picked Morgan up from camp yesterday, I let her know that I made her appointment for next week. She's been asking about it because she knows that shots are part of the package. So, now she knows when it's going to happen.

Today, I told Morgan that she could pick either of us, Daddy or me, to go with her to her doctor's appointment.

"Okay. I need some time to think about it. I want to pick someone who's going to be responsible with my shots", she tells me. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Okay. That sounds fair." We continue to discuss her appointment and she tells me that she's going to try not to cry and she's going to try to be brave.

During dinner tonight, I told Lance that Morgan was thinking about who she wanted to have take her to the doctor next week and that she was considering who she thought would be responsible. Then she says, "Daddy? Do you think you can handle it?". I almost peed my pants.
Lance lets her know that we won't be giving her the shots, that the nurse will do that. She was like, "Oh yeah. Well, you need to be there to make sure it all goes okay." I added, "Maybe hold your hand". She emphasized it to him, "Yeah, can you handle THAT?!" Lance said, "I can definitely handle that."

As of now, she still hasn't made her decision. What will I do if it's not me??!

Brotherly/Sisterly Love

So much for early starts. I had thought that I might get an early start today and get up before the kids. I woke up at 5:20 when Lance's alarm went off, rolled over and thought to myself "get up when he gets out of the shower". You know the problem with that? When your husband is some sort of stealthy ninja dresser and you don't hear him get out of the shower. So, instead, I wake up at 8 am. And shortly after my waking, Morgan comes into the room to figure out why I'm still in bed and to announce that she is STARVING.

I get her set up with breakfast and run back upstairs to shower before Bennett is awake. Only, he wakes up right as I'm getting in the shower. I rush through my shower and then go to him and he just looks at me and smiles. I ask him if he wants to get out and he shakes his head no. Do you want to get down? Again, no. Morgan's in the room and he starts running all around the crib laughing, so it's clear that he wants to play with her. But not OUTSIDE of the crib. He wants to be in the crib with her on the outside.

They've been in there for at least 20 minutes and I just went to check on them. What I found really tugged at my heartstrings. This is why I'm glad we chose to have the therapy-inducing second child. Morgan is reading Winnie-the-Pooh to him and he's actually paying attention! Awwww!